Out in Vancouver: March 9–16, 2017

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Choice events in the city this week

Friday, March 17

Scene Queen 2: A Romy And Michele Evening

We’ve all seen a few of our local queens cause a scene when someone steals their number or (gasp) shows up in the same outfit, but this is a scene of a different sort. Join Dee Blew and Amy Grindhouse for a special screening of Romy and Michele's High School Reunion, followed by a special performance inspired by this classic comedy. Relive your glory days with two of the funniest queens in town.

6–10pm. Vancouver Art & Leisure, 1965 Main St. Cover $10 but also gets you discounted entry to the Jason Kending show following. vancouver.gaycities.com/events/792490-scene-queen-have-a-romy-and-michele-evening

Countdown To Coronation Madness

And so it begins, the week of endless in-town, out-of-town, should-be-run-out-of-town shows, the scent of every perfume imaginable mixed together in your favourite bar, and pieces of taffeta and boa feathers strewn all over everything, including the urinals. Tonight is the lead-in to next weekend’s Coronation 46 with Faux Girl’s in-town show, where, I am sure, every queen will be in green for St Patty’s. Host Empress XLV Sienna Blaze and guests will dazzle and entertain you to death.

9pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. Cover $5 after 9pm. facebook.com/events/1005219932955264/

Wet & Wild

I don’t usually write in the same event twice in a row, but when something special comes up that I don’t want to miss, I have to pass it on. Tonight Mr Stamp has procured Gogo Gent for the shower part of the evening. Gogo Gent is a hot, muscular male specimen who comes with a very impressive package. If you haven’t seen him work before, this is your chance. Note to self: don’t stand too close to the glass shower wall, because that thing looks like it will break through it if he swings it around.

Doors 9pm, music 10pm, dicks out 11:30pm. Pumpjack Pub, 1167 Davie St. Cover $5. facebook.com/thepumpjackpub/

The Judy Show

I guess Punch has been replaced, or else he’s in drag for the night. How many millennials know what I’m saying? Join Dee Blew, Dust, Amy Grindhouse, Karmella Barr and their guests for a night of stories, drag numbers and drinks. Take a look inside their friendship and watch them tackle songs they have chosen for each other! Duets, group numbers and maybe even a couple jokes. There’s even a request sheet for the DJ, unheard of these days.

9pm–3am. The Odyssey, 686 W Hastings St. Cover $7. facebook.com/events/409214366095562/

Saturday, March 18

Get Out And Vote

The polls are open for the next emperor and empress today and, unlike most years when there has been a plethora of candidates to choose from, this year I believe there are two. Get out and support the candidates who are willing to work their asses off for our community all year raising money for local charities. There may only be two running but at least they have the balls to do it. Well one does; the other is tucked.

3–9pm. Little Sister’s Bookstore, 1238 Davie St. facebook.com/TFDpresents/

Kick Off Spring: Queer Dance Party

I know it seems like spring takes longer to come than Conni Smudge at a gangbang, but it does happen eventually. Shake off the winter clothes, get on your best spring outfit, hat and all, and shake your bootie at Not So Strictly Ballroom’s first social dance of 2017. All sizes, shapes, genders and ethnicities are welcome; just dance and have fun. Dancers and non-dancers alike have fun at NSSB's dances. Don’t worry if you don't know the steps. Make them up!

8–11:30pm. Harbour Dance Centre, 927 Granville St, second floor. Tickets $12–$15 sliding scale at the door. facebook.com/events/1276901485750920/

Growlr RoughHouse

Funny how words bring back long forgotten memories. When I was in high school, my friends and I had a code word for whenever we were out at the bar with a date. We would set up a prearranged “accidental” meeting, and if we put the word growler into any sentence, our friend knew the date was going badly and we needed an excuse to get out of it. Juvenile, yes, but very effective. Tonight, though, it has an entirely different context. This is the Vancouver debut of another American party for men and, from the looks of the poster, it will be a good one. DJs Del Stamp and Mateo Segade will provide rough, sexy beats to set the mood. Guest hosts, hot gogos and a full nude shower show will provide the heat. After that, it’s up to you and your own pick-up tricks

9pm–3am. The Odyssey, 686 W Hastings St. Tickets $12 at Top Drawers, 809 Davie St. facebook.com/events/1876814102531795/

Sunday, March 19

Out For Kicks

There’s nothing better than men with awesome soccer butts in short shorts; well, okay, it would be better without the shorts. There will be men, there will be awesome butts and I know there will be a few short shorts — I’ve seen hottie captains Luke and Dave out shopping — at this year’s St Patrick’s Day indoor tournament. This fantastic, low-key and fun event will also be a fundraiser for OFK teams participating in IGFLA’s Gay Games Championship in Paris in 2018. Come out and watch the fun.

9am–2pm. 8 Rinks, 6501 Sprott St, Burnaby. outforkicks.ca/forms/13894-2017-OFK-St-Patrick-s-Indoor-Tournament-March-19th-9am

Remembering David Mackay

David Mackay, a lifelong political activist, passed away Feb 15 of a heart attack after a decades long struggle with HIV/AIDS. Long-time friends describe him as a deeply compassionate human being, stubbornly committed to the fight for justice especially for marginalized communities. A memorial will take place today, and I hope all his friends and loved ones will drop in to say goodbye and share stories.

1pm. Gordon Neighborhood House, 1019 Broughton St.

Monday, March 20

MoMondays

I would love MoSaturdays, can tolerate MoSundays, but MoMondays? Come on, isn’t the work week long enough as it is? Apparently not. This monthly night features five or six people telling their personal stories and sharing life lessons. Some are funny, some are thought-provoking, and all are inspiring. This is a great opportunity to socialize and interact in a fun, positive environment and meet some new, friendly people. Put in your speaker application to speak or grab some friends and get your fix of heart, humour and happiness.

7–10pm. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. Tickets $15 and up at facebook.com/events/1456916874341031/

Tuesday, March 21

Get Kinky With HIM

By now your New Year’s Eve love has started to get stale and your Valentine’s Day fling is starting to feel monotonous, so get your big boy panties on and do something about it. Tonight HIM teaches you everything you need to know about bondage and rope play. At least if you restrain him with your new knowledge about knots and duct tape, he won’t be able to leave. A fun and informative night for all.

7–9pm. HIM, 1033 Davie St. To register email register@checkhimout.ca or call 604-488-1001. checkhimout.ca.

Wednesday, March 22

Bingo For Life

This weekly extravaganza for the Friends For Life Society is filled with brilliant prizes, cheap drinks and snappy drag queens, hosted by the snappiest of them all, Del Stamp. Come be entertained by a few of his closest drag queen friends. It’s never too late to grab life, or Del Stamp, by the balls. Bring your own things to decorate your table, because you are not touching my dabber.

8–10pm. Celebrities, 1022 Davie St. $10 donation get you in and gets you your cards. celebritiesnightclub.com/events/bingo-for-life-42

Think there’s an upcoming event I should attend? Click here to list your event on dailyxtra.com or send me a note at oitc.vancouver@dailyxtra.com.

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Thursday, March 23

TransGathering Community Roundtable

TransGathering has a long history of providing support, services and connections to the trans community in our city. Anyone who identifies within the trans community, including friends and family, is welcome to come discuss the group’s needs and direction. The group would specifically like to extend an invitation to trans-identifying black, indigenous and people of colour communities.

5–7pm. Britannia Community Services Centre, 1661 Napier St. whatsonqueerbc.com/event/transgathering-community-roundtable/

Queenmunity: A Fundraiser For Qmunity

Jane Smokr, as usual, is leading the pack; and what a pack it is. A plethora of queens and kings are gathering for a common purpose: to support Qmunity, BC’s queer, trans and two-spirit resource centre. Hosted by Dee Blew and Dust, with tunes by DJ Maxwell Maxwell, the night will come alive with performances of all kinds. With this many queens all in one place there is bound to be a bit of drama, so don’t wait to hear about it around the water cooler. Join in the fun tonight and support a great cause, the growing need for accessible mental health and well-being resources.

9pm–12am. Celebrities, 1022 Davie St. Entrance by donation, minimum donation $7. facebook.com/events/208330579648058/

Whatever Pool Party After Hours

Anything after hours always gets me into trouble, and with “Whatever” in the title I’m bound to lose a few bits of clothing. Doing that at this event would probably get me 10 to 20 in the big house, however, and I don’t mean Joan-E’s place. This event is for the 13–18 LGBT crowd only. Once the pool has closed for the evening the fun really gets going at this after-hours, all-bodies swim which features a water slide, lazy river, hot tub and an inflatable aquatic obstacle course. Please note that parents, guardians, youth workers and other adult allies are welcome and will have access to a comfortable waiting area and refreshments.

10:30pm–12:30am. West Vancouver Aquatic Centre, 2121 Marine Drive, West Vancouver. Photo ID is needed for entry to this free event. whatsonqueerbc.com/event/whatever-pool-party/

Friday, March 24

Sissy Boy

If you think back a few decades ago to when this event took place at the original Odyssey, you may remember how successful and fun it was. Unfortunately, I’m too young to have been there but, luckily for all of us, Carlotta Gurl was, and she’s bringing it all back. Jules was the original DJ and, although he left us a few years ago, there is a smaller, hairier and gingerier DJ taking his place. DJ Gingerbear Todd will provide the tunes for dancing and performances by Mina Mercury, Mandy Kamp, Miss M, Alabama and the old doll herself Carlotta Gurl. It’s a night of bumping mixes from the 70s, 80s, and 90s with some sassy and sultry performances by the queens who reigned over the city then.

9pm–3am. The Odyssey, 686 W Hastings St. Cover $5. facebook.com/events/174201009757542/

Saturday, March 25

Coronation 46 Ball

The night is finally here! It’s like the Oscars for drag queens, but without Jimmy Kimmel. If you are looking for pomp and circumstance with a few drag performances thrown in, then this is the night for you. Between the introduction of every court in the free world, and more speeches than Trump at a KKK gathering, you’ll have more than enough time for chit chat with your friends in the audience. One of the highlights this year is De De Drew’s 37-year walk, which is about how long it takes to get through the crowd to the bar. If you have never been to a coronation, you should go at least once or lose your gay membership card.

5pm—late. Performance Works, 1218 Cartwright St, Granville Island. Tickets $45 in advance at Top Drawers, 809 Davie St and Little Sister’s 1238 Davie St. $55 at Door. mothercourt.ca/Coronation.html

Shaping Sound

Under the artistic direction of Emmy Award winner Travis Wall, and co-created with Nick Lazzarini, Teddy Forance and Kyle Robinson, this electrifying mash-up of jaw dropping dance styles and musical genres is brought fully to life on stage by a dynamic company of contemporary dancers. The men formerly associated with So You Think You Can Dance and Dancing with the Stars bring their considerable acumen and choreographic charm, infused with a refreshing intelligence, into a smart blend of television, stage and screen dance. An evening not to be missed.

8pm. Queen Elizabeth Theatre, 650 Hamilton St. Tickets $51–$93 at ticketstonight.ticketforce.com/ or online at shapingsoundco.com/.

Loli*Pop: Weeaboo Trash

Whenever I see this event I think of the 1960’s hit “My Boy Lollipop,” which always sounded like a gay theme song to me. Come join Ilona and Coco, along with their special guest Dee Blew, to celebrate iconic anime and some of your favourite J-Pop and K-Pop stars. Performances by Anna May, Sherrie Blossom and the big Lollipop himself, DJ Del Stamp. Let them show you how to suck one the right way.

9pm–3am. The Odyssey, 686 West Hastings St. Cover $5. facebook.com/events/1829517653955135/

Divine: Drag Disco Party

Get ready for a new Studio 54-style vintage drag and disco party, and bring your furs and skin-tight pants. The headmistress of throwbacks — and throwing a few back — Shanda Leer will host alongside Jef Leppard and Trevor Risk, as well as majestic drag hostesses Cinnamon Winters and Poison Apple. Come dance to disco and extended dance hits the way the sleazy and the bourgeois danced decades ago.

10:30pm–2am. The Fox Cabaret, 2321 Main St. Cover $12 at door. facebook.com/events/1662774480696063/?notif_t=plan_user_invited&notif_id=1490132594199188

Sunday, March 26

Vancouver Art and Leisure Pop Up Market

The Vintage Handmade Society, in collaboration with Vancouver Art and Leisure, presents a spring market for everyone. Take a look at products including skincare, art, jewelry, pottery, candles, clothing, blankets, vinyl, a tarot booth, live painting and more.

12–6pm. Gallery 1965, 1965 Main St. Admission $2. facebook.com/events/659785060867079/

Kegger Afternoon

Had enough of drag shows and coronation chit chat? Just want an afternoon of hot, sweaty men and a DJ who knows how to party? This is the place to get it all: beer, booze, butts and Bertossi. Can’t go wrong with a combination like that.

1pm. Pumpjack Pub, 1167 Davie St. No cover. pumpjackpub.com.

Sleepy Girls 3: Bad Influences

Trust me, you do not want to fall asleep at the Sleepy Girls show. Between Carlotta Gurl, Alma B Itches, Sherrie Blossom and Rogue, you don’t know who will be on what part of you when you wake up. If you open your eyes and see a deep, dark tunnel, don’t worry, that’s just Carlotta taking a seat. What corrupted your innocence? Who was involved? Come listen to stories about corruption and general teenage debauchery, told through the art of drag.

8:30pm–12am. Displace Hashery, 3293 West 4^th Ave. Cover $10 at door. facebook.com/events/602849623249063/

Monday, March 27

Answer Me

How many guys, when they were young, used to watch wrestling to jerk off at the hot guys getting beat up. Hmmm, looks like just me. Here is a perfect night to put all that useless information to work for you: a night of classic wrestling trivia. WWF, WWE, RAW, WCW, in a room full of men and Shanda Leer. Five rounds with five questions each, no more than five people to a team, and the team with the most points will win first prize, the second team gets second prize, and you get where they’re going with this.

7–10pm. The American, 926 Main St. No cover. facebook.com/events/1239613902741097/

B-Roll: Toy Story

The girls are getting sacrilegious with B-Roll’s take on one of the greatest shows of all time, Toy Story. Drag out the box from your parent's attic and get ready to play with your favorite childhood memories, before they’re tainted forever. I can’t wait to see who has a woody. I mean, who is Woody.

9pm–1am. The Penthouse, 1019 Seymour St. Tickets $10 advance online on Facebook or $12 cash at door. facebook.com/events/1294495613962352/

Tuesday, March 28

Anal Play For The Ladies

Okay ladies, men can’t be the only ones getting down and dirty. I know you’re interested as well, and here is your chance to find out. Can women enjoy anal play? How do you get started? Presented by Robyn, this workshop and demo will explore anal play for women, and how to help everyone involved have a great time. And yes, there is a live demo.

7:30pm. The Art Of Loving, 369 West Broadway St. Tickets $50 and register online at artofloving.ca/.

Peach Cobblah’s 150th

I know after a long weekend of drag the old doll can look 150, but this is actually Peach Cobblah’s 150th Shame Spiral Show. I know, can you believe that sweaty, foul-mouthed, middle-of-the-road train wreck former baddest bitch of East Van turned West End sellout has done her little Tuesday atrocity 150 times? But it’s true, so come on down and celebrate, because you know every queen in town is going to show up and turn one out.

10pm–3am. 1181, 1181 Davie St. No cover. facebook.com/events/1910689772495800/

Magic Mic

With all the political Trump-Russia ridiculousness going on, one good thing to happen this year is the comeback of comedy and amateur nights. Come in and turn off your brain. You never know what’s going to happen, so just let it. Hosted by Steev Letts and Oil Maughan, with a roll of comedians, musicians and performance acts. Sign up starts at 7:30pm and pros, amateurs and first timers are all welcome.

7–10pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. No cover. facebook.com/events/422946591430414/

Wednesday, March 29

Slacks

Join roommates Jackie and Taylor and their wacky friends as they navigate life, love and other stupidities in these new episodes of Slacks. Written and directed by Jacqueline Korb. Starring Jacqueline Korb, Taylor Stutchbury, Leigh Burrows, Kiri McGuire and Tara Wilson.

8pm. Havana Theatre, 1212 Commercial Dr. Tickets $18 at the door or online at littlebaskettheatre.com/. Show runs Wednesday, March 29 until Saturday, April 1.

Think there’s an upcoming event I should attend? Click here to list your event on dailyxtra.com or send me a note at oitc.vancouver@dailyxtra.com.

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Your playlist can make or break a night out

Power bottoms rejoice! Buddies in Bad Times Theatre has you covered with its cheekily named queer dance party, Top 40 for Bottoms. Don’t worry, tops don’t get charged a different cover at the door or anything, although that’s a marketing tactic we could get behind — or rather, in front of. Featuring those queer anthems we all know and love and different DJs each week, a new take on what defines top 40 is offered for each installment of the event, keeping the music roster fresh for each chapter of Top 40 for Bottoms.

Now, you may be asking yourself: how does one go about crafting a playlist for bottoms, exactly? As much fun as a continuous loop of “Don’t Want No Short Dick Man” and “Push It” would be fun, there’s a lot more to it.

To get to the bottom of it, Xtra got in touch with one of the DJs from the event, Regina the Gentlelady, and it turns out that the key to a great playlist sure to please any bottom that listens to it can be summarized in one word — Britney.

Seriously, who doesn’t love Britney?

Well, they actually play a lot more than just Britney Spears, but really, do you need more (Gimme more, gimme more) than that? Well, if you did for some crazy reason, expect to hear all of the big divas of pop at this event. Ariana Grande, Nicki Minaj, Rihanna, Fifth Harmony and Beyoncé will all be making their way through the playlist. Did we mention Britney? Because if we didn’t, Britney Spears will also be playing. Britney.

In case you missed us mentioning Britney Spears.

If you’re lucky enough to be attending the event when Top 40 for Bottom’s resident DJing drag queen Regina the Gentlelady is spinning, make sure to go say hi to her at the DJ stand at the top of the famous Buddies staircase. She’s always open to requests and is down for making the event extra campy by playing what you want to hear. Maybe leave the Lana Del Rey for another day though, she’s gotta keep those energy levels up for the crowd.

Featuring an in-drag DJ alongside a drag queen performance definitely changes the atmosphere of the event overall, making the space more fabulous, fun and above all else, queer. Honestly though, what event isn’t improved by a drag queen? It’s a simple truth that drag queens make everything better. Fact. And Buddies delivers on this promise with your favorite top 40 music accompanying these queens week after week, there’s even a rumor going around that they’ll be playing some Britney Spears at this event as well, so there’s that too!

Buddies in Bad Times Theatre has always been a cornerstone of Toronto’s queer culture, promoting inclusiveness, accessibility, and of course, a good time — with Top 40 for Bottoms being no exception to this rule. Buddies offers a warm and welcoming environment to anyone looking to get weird with some top 40 regardless of their gender or sexual orientation, and to those who can follow the one posted rule on their website: “Don’t be a jackass” — easy enough! Hopefully douches are still on the OK list, though.

If you’re ready to Break Free, be a Dangerous Woman, get in Formation and get to Work (Work, Work, Work, Work, Work) then this is the place to do it. So do some Kegels, grab your favourite top and head down to Buddies in Bad Times Theatre for its next installment of Top 40 for Bottoms.

Top 40 for Bottoms
Saturday nights, Buddies in Bad Times Theatre, 12 Alexander St, Toronto
buddiesinbadtimes.com/saturdays

The queer dance party, Top 40 for Bottoms, happens at Buddies in Bad Times Theatre every Saturday.
ArthurHidden/iStock/Thinkstock

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Choice events in the city this week

Thursday, March 30

Dining Out For Life

As if my partner and I need another excuse to leave the oven off and go out for dinner — have you seen the size of us? From Whistler to White Rock and across the Lower Mainland, Dining Out for Life’s restaurant partners will contribute 25 percent of their food sales to A Loving Spoonful, who provide free, nutritious meals for people living with HIV/AIDS. Grab a few friends and make this a day to remember.

Lunch and dinner at over 60 participating restaurants. Check diningoutforlife.com for info and a full list of eateries.

Friday, March 31

Cloud 9

Before you get all excited, like I did, thinking the Empire Landmark is finally throwing a gay night at the revolving Cloud 9 restaurant before it’s torn down, sit back down. Hell has not frozen over. This Cloud 9 deserves much more of your attention: the 9th anniversary of the Man Up show, one of our community's longest running queer parties. Man Up began as an effort to revitalize the once vibrant local drag king scene, and tonight this party celebrates everyone for supporting the artists, creating the space, dressing for the themes, shredding the dance floor, giving the feedback, and looking ahead together.

9pm–2am. The Cobalt, 917 Main St. Tickets $15 at brownpapertickets.com and at facebook.com/events/1266877716759917/

Kink V: Fetish Nights

Since I don’t really like walking around in kink or fetish wear on the streets — as if a six-foot-eight bear covered in latex is going unnoticed — the closer a kink party is to my condo the better. This is about as close as you can get. This is a PLUR kink-based LGBTQ and straight-friendly event, so please come open minded. When you arrive, you will be asked to show the door mistress exactly what you are wearing or planning to wear. The dress code is strict: The more wild you dress, the more at home you will feel once you step in the door. Dungeon space, gear check, gear slaves and even a performance by the Borg Queen will make this a night to remember.

9pm–3am. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. $15 before 10pm, $18 before 11pm, $20 after. facebook.com/events/1406655629346949/

Surprise Bitch

The last time someone said this to me I was looking up a hunky man’s kilt from the floor. The surprise was that the shy fellow was wearing boxers — a complete waste of effort. This night, however, is a function of the House of Bitches as they host their second pop-up event. With a list of bitches, also known as performers, from Surrey to the West End, there is bound to be something you like, or at least something to bitch about. Just be careful, since the head bitch is none other than Alma B Itches, and she will be more than happy to let you have it.

9:30pm–3am. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. Cover $5 at the door. facebook.com/events/1117522361693230/

Wet & Wild: Rubbout Meat & Greet

It all starts early this afternoon with the Rubbout Meat & Greet from 3–8pm. Pick up a weekend swag bag — no Gingerbear Todd I don’t mean you — put on wristbands and have a few loosening-up cocktails. Come back later for Shower Night and then the Rubber Dance Party. I love virgin shower night, and tonight there’s a virgin for us all to watch. Sometimes they are like deer in headlights, and sometimes things are so hard they rip through their shorts. Tonight is a special pre-Rubbout Wet & Wild, so don’t blow your load over the first showeree, or the second, or the third. There are two more nude studs from the Rubbout Crew to show off their meaty parts. Music is provided by that magical DJ who can make a dick disappear faster than your mother can unbutton her overalls, DJ Del Stamp.

10pm. Pumpjack Pub, 1167 Davie St. Cover $5. rubbout.com

Saturday, April 1

One Love Wedding Show

With three weddings under my belt, I think I’m a bit late for this show. But, for all you others that are hoping he or she will pop the question, maybe this will give a shove in the right direction. Plus, there’s even a chance to win your wedding. At One Love Wedding Experience, they don't simply promote diversity, they celebrate it. People are people and love is love. They support same sex marriage and have collaborated with suppliers who support and mirror the same philosophy. Witness a live wedding ceremony, fashion show, prizes and even a DJ spin party.

11am–4pm. Roundhouse, 181 Roundhouse Mews. Tickets $20 each at oneloveweddingexperience.com/ and if you go early there may be a Groupon attached for 70 percent off.

Gear Swap

Funny story — and no it was not me — names shall be left out to protect the innocent, right James? I know a guy who went to last year’s Gear Swap for the first time and got so turned on by the used leather he spent $225, took it all home, and played alone with the leather so long he missed the Rubbout Party all together. Now that is dedication. Every year this gear swap just gets better and better. This year is no different. Bring your gear in the morning, sell it at the swap, and find some new gear you just must have. Intake is 11:00am until 1:00pm so bring your gear then if you want to sell it. Sales start at 1:00pm.

1–5pm. Pumpjack Pub, 1167 Davie St. Cover $2 but free for Saturday night ticket holders and wristbands. rubbout.com.

Drag Show at The Stage

Coronation may be gone for this year, stop cheering, but that Miz Adrien is still going strong in the burbs and is taking her show all the way to Mission, where men are men and queens get extremely lucky I hear. Tonight Join the Miz and her friends for a heart stopping show followed by dancing until late. Who knows, there may be a cowboy whose boots are going to be under your bed tonight. This is a bar show, so there’s room for everyone.

Doors 7pm, show 9pm followed by dancing. The Stage, 32998 1st Ave, Mission. Tickets $10 advance at thestageinmission.ca/ or $15 at door.

Trivia Night Fundraiser

I know you thought I was going to do all the listings and not have a Peach Cobblah moment, but not so fast. She never stops, and does she even sleep? Tonight she is quizmaster and co-host alongside Nicole Yeasting, but I bet Nicole won’t get to say a word with our old doll running the show. This is a fundraising night to benefit the Vancouver International Children’s Festival Hospital Program, an amazing outreach group that brings the festival to children receiving treatment or in care. Grab a team and prepare to answer questions about sports, music, logos, books, movies, and more. Prizes will be awarded to the top team. A raffle and silent auction will also be happening, as well as a cash bar and snacks for an excellent cause. If you can’t make the night, please feel free to donate at childrensfestival.ca.

7pm. Loungeworks Showroom, 130 West 4th Ave. Tickets $22 online facebook.com/events/1369541433067078/

Stand Up, Stand Out

Why stay at home and fall for your friends’ April Fools pranks all night? Get out and have fun at someone else’s expense, probably mine, at the April Fool’s Edition of Stand Up, Stand Out, a mix of local comedians hosting an LGBT open mic. Hosted by Steve Leets, Vancouver’s Funniest Amateur Comedian 2016, along with Fatima Dhowre and a dozen or so guest comics. There will also be ASL interpreters for the show.

8–10:30pm. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. Tickets are available online at eventbrite.com or at the door, with a sliding scale of $10-$15. Contact the hosts for PWYC tickets or other accessibility info at facebook.com/events/1903235326564950/.

The Queen Of Ireland

One of the best drag names around, Panti Bliss, aka. Rory O’Neill, just happens to be an outrageous, scandalous, intelligent and eloquent queen in the best possible ways, and is regarded as one of the best in the world. Over the last few years, Rory has become a figurehead for LGBT rights in Ireland, and since the recent “Pantigate” scandal, his fight for equality and against homophobia has become recognised across the world. The Queen of Ireland is a documentary film that follows Rory’s journey from the small Mayo town of Ballinrobe to the world stage. There will a reception before the film.

9–11:30pm.Vancity Theatre, 1181 Seymour St. Tickets $10 advance at viff.org or $15 at door. facebook.com/events/784127868410666/.

Rubbout 26 Gear & Play Party

And so, it begins. If you hear squeaking around town, it’s just the latex covered thighs rubbing or the skin-tight leather pants being broken in as every leather, rubber and latex-loving man is out this weekend at the longest consecutively running men’s fetish event in North America. If leather and fetish are your thing and you can’t find it this weekend, you might be a closet straight. Tonight, go down underground to a party for all gear enthusiasts, leather, sports or whatever your fetish, with the rubber men from all over the world. If you have no gear, naked or a jock will be just fine, but no street clothes, please.

10pm–2am. Underground, 1022 Davie St. Tickets $45 at the door or included with Rubbout Wristband. If you still want to play and you’re not worn out, your wristband or ticket stub will get you into Steamworks after 1:30am. Full schedule of events at rubbout.com/.

Circo Disco

I have to admit I was excited because I thought this was a combination of circus and disco, kind of a Saturday Night Fever Cirque De Soleil. But I was wrong; it happens sometimes. This is an official fundraiser for the HIM Transitions program, a daring collaboration of cabaret troupe, nightlife character performance art, live performance, lip-sync performance, DJ music programming and drag, where costume and choreography meet uninhibited hedonism. The music will be a sensory journey of house and disco from around the world, including deep, vocal, progressive and tribal house brought to you by DJs Mike Cross and Idris Hudson. Geekenders performers will perform live numbers from their rendition of Rocky Horror Picture Show and a Stormtrooper Burlesque.

10pm–3am. The Odyssey, 686 W Hastings St. Admission is by donation to HIM and Geekenders. Suggested donation is $10, pay what you can. facebook.com/events/425314714479590/

Monday, April 3

Trans Supper Club

PACE Society, a Vancouver peer-driven organization that provides support to sex workers, will be launching the Trans Supper Club, a weekly meal program and drop-in service for transgender, two-spirit, and gender-diverse persons on the city’s Downtown Eastside. The program will be situated within PACE's larger program of support services, which includes case management, peer counselling services, and transgender-specific programming. This new program will also operate in conjunction with PACE Society’s Gender Self-Determination Project, which assists trans people in the Greater Vancouver Area with legally changing their names and gender markers on government identification.

5-7pm. PACE Society, 148 W Hastings St. pace-society.org/

Flex Fit with HIM

OMG! Spring is here, so Pride is right around the corner. How many of you have even used that gym membership you signed up for Jan 2? This weekly group will transition you into it, combining muscle strengthening and stretching exercises such as push-ups, squats, yoga, basic Pilates, core exercises, and resistance band training. Bring a mat, towel and bottle of water because you will sweat. All levels are welcome, so drop by and drop the winter weight.

5:30–6:30pm. Scotiabank Dance Centre, 677 Davie St. Free class. checkhimout.ca.

Tuesday, April 4

Pleasuring Prostates: Live Demo

Now, I like my prostate as much as the next guy, but a live demo of one being rubbed is a little over the top even for me. I would almost go just to see who has the balls — well I guess those would be pushed aside — to lay back and get probed while a group looks on. This is an intriguing class for those who have never experienced the pleasure of a prostate massage. You will ejaculate like a 16-year-old, I promise. Take a chance, you may see me after all.

7:30pm.The Art Of Loving, 369 West Broadway St. Class $50 please register in advance at artofloving.ca.

Wednesday, April 5

Connect With Him: Surrey

Out in Surrey and finding it hard to meet guys as friends? The Health Initiative for Men (HIM) provides a wide variety of weekly activities, presentations and workshops for guys of all ages. Come on in and find out what events are happening each week.

7–8:30pm. HIM Surrey, 220-10362 King George Blvd, Surrey. Free group. checkhimout.ca

Think there’s an upcoming event I should attend? Click here to list your event on dailyxtra.com or send me a note at oitc.vancouver@dailyxtra.com.

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Only 40 venues in Toronto have a nightclub licence and most are located in the Entertainment District

Toronto isn’t the town from Footloose yet, but it’s getting close.

City councillors are looking at potentially cracking down on nightclubs that operate without a nightclub licence, which includes most, if not all, LGBT clubs in Toronto.

Nightclub licences are rarely given to venues outside of the Entertainment District, meaning that clubs in Church-Wellesley Village, West Queen West, Little Italy and Bloor St West could be fined or shut down on a moment’s notice.

In March 2017, the licensing and standards committee asked the head of Toronto’s licensing department to report on the issue in April.

“There are operators that are circumventing the licensing process by applying for a restaurant licence and then at night taking away the restaurant chairs and operating illegally as a night club,” says Councillor Jim Karygiannis by email. Karygiannis, who presented the motion, is also the co-chair of the city's municipal licensing and standards committee. “There are examples when looking at these establishments websites and they are packing people into small spaces and that could be dangerous.”

Currently, there are only 40 venues in Toronto that have a nightclub licence, the vast majority of which are in the Entertainment District. None of these venues regularly host LGBT events.

“If a venue is outside the area where they cannot apply for these licences then they should not be carrying on an inappropriate venue,” Karygiannis says. “On the other hand, we should look at expanding these venues outside the entertainment district in order to look after all the communities which want to have entertainment facilities.”

Karygiannis urged anyone with concerns to get in touch with the licensing and standards committee.

Noel Gerry, a lawyer who represents bars and clubs in Toronto, says that city bylaws make it almost impossible for nightclubs to follow the rules.

“The issue is you actually have to have zoning for a nightclub, and that’s virtually non-existent,” he says. “It’s pretty much restricted to the Entertainment District.”

The only option that nightclub owners have is to try to change the zoning bylaw in their neighbourhoods.

“And that’s an extremely difficult thing to do,” he says. “It’s time consuming and expensive, and usually the local city councillor would oppose it.”

Venues operating without a nightclub licence can be fined thousands of dollars or even be taken to court and shut down for up to two years.

Kelly Kyle, the chair of the Church-Wellesley Village Business Improvement Area, says that she hopes the city is willing to work with businesses instead of fining them or shutting them down.

“I would hope that they would have some compassion and work with the establishments that are here that may fall under that umbrella,” she says.

Kyle believes that having nightlife outside of the Entertainment District is essential for LGBT Torontonians.

“I do think that it plays a vital role for the community to have a safe place,” she says.

Clubgoers party on Church Street at the now-defunct bar and restaurant Byzantium in May 2014.
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Choice events in the city this week

Thursday, April 6

Utopia

You don’t see the man for months — and think he’s off to some sex camp — but John Ferrie is really delving into that secretive mind to bring you amazing art. His art always tells a story, with the history of the city inside it. Much like himself, John’s lines are curvy, kinetic and sinuous, and never straight, and his candy-bright colours radiate an alluring sensuality. Along with his dramatic landscapes, Ferrie has earned recognition for his ongoing series of vivid floral works. Grab a friend or two and check out this not-to-be-missed show. You know one will look great on the wall.

6–9pm. Mainspace, 350 East 2nd Ave. Show runs until Sunday, April 16. No cover. facebook.com/events/2235666319991981/

Super Gay Thursdays

Super gay DJs, divas and drag: Throw in a couple of towel boys and it’s like a Thursday night at Conni Smudge’s place. But unlike Conni’s, you can leave with your prostate intact. This is a monthly event where some of the village’s best entertain you for hours. With hosts Matthew Page with DJs Del Stamp, Skylar Love and My Gay Husband, what could possibly make it better? Ilona, Coco Klein, Eva Scarlett and Molly Poppinz performing, for a start.

10pm–3am.Celebrities, 1022 Davie St. Free entrance with RSVP to celebritiesnightclub.com. More info at facebook.com/events/262632650851999/.

Friday, April 7

First Annual Peak Pride Festival

Yes, I’ve had some wine, but is this a Pride listing already? The season is starting, and what better way to get your Pride on than to get out of town? Get in on the ground floor at the first Peak Pride Festival. Imagine being at the first Palm Springs White Party in 1989 — although after 27 years of white party drugs, I’m sure I’d look 102 by now. Peak Pride is Canada’s newest winter Pride destination, and this year’s headliner is Alyssa Edwards.

Peak Pride runs until Sunday, April 9, Big White Ski Resort, Kelowna. For more info and event tickets, with full weekend passes from $149: peakpride.ca.

Spencer Chandra Herbert

One of the best things to happen to the West End was the day this little fellow got elected, not once, not twice, but three times — and here we go for round four. As the West End's MLA, he stands up for everyone in our unique little city within a city, and fights for our neighbourhood’s stability. Some of his future goals include affordable housing, good jobs, great healthcare, new schools, and a healthy environment. Come celebrate the opening of his campaign office and show your support.

5:30–8pm. Campaign Office, 990 Denman St. facebook.com/events/824970650987609/.

Molly’s Comedy Cabaret

If you’ve never been around Molly Wilson, let me warn you now, if you stand too close, get ready to lose an eardrum. That lady is a vocal powerhouse. From Broadway to pop to Motown, there is never a dull moment. This month's guest star is Dayton Pagliericci. This just might be the best entertainment value in town.

8:30–10pm. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. Tickets $15 at door. facebook.com/events/1378691082176359/

Saturday, April 8

Duelling DJs Spring Dance For Women

It’s a duel, and the winner gets to be DJ for the night. Think of it as a musical MMA fight. It’s been a rough winter, so come on out, kick up your heels, and dance your body into shape for summer. Take a short jaunt out of the downtown core and meet a new flock of people to lust over. A trip out of town is always a good excuse to stay over after a few cocktails with the town hottie.

7:30pm. Aldergrove Legion, 26607 Fraser Hwy, Aldergrove. Tickets $20 at dueling-djs.com. Info at whatsonqueerbc.com/event/duelling-djs-spring-dance-women/.

Wipeout

For an event called Wipeout, it seems fitting the DJ is none other than Del Stamp. I drink so much when he’s playing that I’m surprised I don’t wipe out more. Tonight is the big party extravaganza of Peak Pride, with queens Alyssa Edwards and Jane Smokr — although if it had been called Whiteout I’m pretty sure I could have named a few other queens who would be there. This is one of the biggest venues in Big White and they are going to blow the roof off.

8pm–1am. Big White Resort, Kelowna. Info and tickets $59 at facebook.com/events/1527878493918932/.

Carnival Of Kink

One of the most colourful parties Sin City Fetish Night throws each year, and also one of the biggest: Think American Horror Story with Fetish gear. Let your inner perv come out at the custom kink visual installations. Chill out in the lounge spaces. Indulge your wild side in the various play areas, including suspension and rope play and a full-size kink play dungeon. Singles, couples, straight, GLBTQ+, cross-dressers, regulars and newbies are all welcome. Sin City is a safe and welcoming perv party and play space for everyone.

9pm–3am. The Odyssey, 686 West Hastings St. Tickets $15 before 10pm, $20 after at the door only. facebook.com/events/119953355165163/

Pump

So I, like some of you, didn’t get my Rubbout ticket in time, and the big play party was sold out for Saturday night. I could tell who had the problem as me because we all ended up at PJs in Rubbout-approvec clothes with nowhere to strip off. Tonight we can make up for that in spades at this monthly night. A different venue, different men, and hopefully a different outcome, since I’m guessing you don’t want to spend another evening with your right hand and a bottle of Gun Oil. Dress code is in effect.

9pm–late. Pumpjack Pub, 1167 Davie St. Cover $5. pumpjackpub.com/.

FuKr Jock and Harness Dance Party

In case you didn’t get enough at Rubbout, or maybe not enough of Rubbout got into you, then here you go. Joe Whitaker comes back to town with one of the hottest jock and harness parties around. DJ Bret Law, this year’s Palm Springs White Party DJ, will heat up the dancefloor until even your jock will feel like too much to wear. In case you were worried about leaving with blue balls, there will be an improved dark area.

10pm–3am. The Hindenburg, 23 West Cordova St. Tickets $10 at eventbrite.com. Info at manupp.net/.

Sunday, April 9

Queers & Beers: Spring Edition

What to do during the wettest spring ever? Another reason to get off your butt and join a group that loves craft beer tasting parties. Turn off your Netflix, put away your sweaters, and come soak up the liquid sunshine of Vancouver with some fellow queers. This is the spring edition of Queers & Beers, a perfectly balanced and thirst-quenching afternoon of meeting new folks, catching up with old friends and enjoying a nice frothy pint of the best damn beer or cider around.

5–10pm.The Cobalt, 917 Main St. Sliding scale entry $7–$15. facebook.com/events/711306842380986/

Man Up Amateur Hour

You may have had your fill of queers for the afternoon, but as my friend Megan says, with her brunch beer and eggs, there’s always room for another beer. There will be more queers, but these are drag kings at Man Up. It’s amateur hour, so pack it, strap it, tape it, tuck it, bind it, boost it, paint it on and then take it all off (or don't!) Calling all kings, queens, things, humans, creatures, gender breakers, celebrators, and you. Queer performers of any gender, race, colour, size, age, ability, and experience level, come get your bits wet in the wonderful world of DIY queer performance art. For more info or to get on the bill, email manupdrag@gmail.com.

9pm.The Cobalt, 917 Main St. Entrance $7 but free if you have the afternoon’s Queers & Beers wristband still on. facebook.com/events/262148254195441/.

Monday, April 10

Del’s Extended Weekend Party

He’s done Peak Pride, he’s done Wipeout, he’s done every guy at both, and now he’s back in town to pull off his own night of, not recovery, but extended weekend. Yes, Del Stamp, the man who metabolizes tequila like it’s holy water, hits the decks to bring you one of the busiest Monday nights around. Cheap drinks, no cover and a hot DJ who can be had for a Kentucky Fried Chicken dinner.

10pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. No cover. junctionpub.com/events/dels-extended-weekend-2017-04-10/

Tuesday, April 11

Lights! Improvised Sketch Comedy

Inspired by The Holy Fuck Comedy Hour — and I don’t mean watching Peach Cobblah get out of a tight dress — this sketch show from New York is the breeding ground for YouTube videos and polished comedy sketch shows. Their mantra is, “Comedy is born here. Funny. Weird. Best. Worst. Unforgettable. Unforgivable.” Twelve of our city’s hottest improv comedians are performing back-to-back original sketches. Come down and maybe you will see a star in the making.

7:30pm. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. $7 at the door. facebook.com/events/1899820143597080/.

Generation Post Script

Up and coming queer playwright Mily Mumford sets this play in the future, two generations from now, when what is left of humanity survives in space stations in orbit around our planet. Interstellar travel is not yet possible and Earth is uninhabitable. A misfit group of college students of the "post script" generation — the first to be born in space — bond over their shared anxieties and a desire to reconcile what happened to the rest of their species.

8pm nightly with 2pm matinees Saturday and Sunday. Studio 1398, 1398 Cartwright St, Granville Island. Show runs until Sunday, April 16. Info and tickets $23–$28 at theatrewire.com/.

Wednesday, April 12

Bears, Bears And More Bears

Trump may have signed an order allowing hibernating bears to be shot, but only in Vancouver can you find bears to shoot on. Every week Steamworks brings you Bear Hump, a weekly gathering of furry men and cubs to enjoy. Come on down, stroll around and find a nice furry bear rug to lie on or better yet, under.

3–9pm. Steamworks Baths, 123 West Pender St. Entrance rates start at $6. steamworksbaths.com/event/bear-hump-38/?instance_id=321319

Annual Mr/Ms Cobalt Drag Competition

Either the months are going by faster or I’m blacking out more, but it’s already time to crown the royalty of The Cobalt at the sixth annual competition. East Vancouver’s finest drag performers vie for the title of Mr/Ms/Mistermiss Cobalt, and a Grand Prize of $500. Do you have what it takes to represent your favourite little homo corner of East Van? Tonight starts the preliminaries leading up to the finale on Friday, May 5. To enter contact Peach Cobblah at facebook.com/peach.cobblah.

8pm–12am.The Cobalt, 917 Main St. Cover $7. facebook.com/events/209181819560226/.

Think there’s an upcoming event I should attend? Click here to list your event on dailyxtra.com or send me a note at oitc.vancouver@dailyxtra.com.

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Contestants drop trou to raise funds for LGBT youth at the annual Mr Ruff competition

Each year a handful of Vancouver’s hottest male strippers and dancers are pitted against each other in one of the region’s sweatiest and hottest competitions, all for a good cause.

Since its inception in 2012, Ruff parties and the Mr Ruff competition have brought in over $10,000 for the Abbey of the Long Cedar Canoe— the registered charity for the Vancouver chapter of the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, an organization that focuses its work in the LGBT community.

The Sisters’ mandate is to support youth homelessness and people living with HIV. They also get involved with educational and health programs. All the money raised during Mr Ruff is donated to local organizations that support the Vancouver LGBT community.

“The Mr Ruff competition is a great opportunity for us to do some fundraising," Paladin Pebbles tells Xtra by email. Pebbles is the mistress of alms and charity (AKA treasurer) for the Sisters.

“HIV rates, as well as other sexually transmitted disease rates are still on the rise in Vancouver, so our visibility helps create awareness,” Pebbles says. “And, of course, we always try to spread joy!”

The 2016 Mr Ruff contest was a record-breaking year, with the four candidates raising more than $3,000. The eventual victor and reigning Mr Ruff 2016, Shane Rooks, played his part in smashing the record by amassing more than $1,200 in donations.

Rooks supported his best friend, Colin, in his successful run for the Mr Ruff crown in 2015, and launched his own bid for the title in 2016. “I did it on a whim and really appreciated the camaraderie among the contestants,” he says.

“It felt great to have a record-setting fundraising run,” he adds, “My goal, when I began, had been to simply beat Colin’s numbers by a couple hundred dollars . . . but I ended up almost doubling his numbers.”

Although Rooks’ reign is coming to an end, he has high hopes for 2017. “It looks like we will be setting new Mr Ruff fundraising records this year. I think our local Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, the Abbey of the Long Cedar Canoe Society, will be very, very pleased.”

The competition will be followed by RUFF’s six-year anniversary party with DJ Nathan Mots and Seattle’s Matt Stands, from 10pm to 3am

As they have been since the first event in 2012, the Sisters will be out in force at all Ruff Vancouver events this year, and Pebbles is brimming with enthusiasm over the latest round of Mr Ruff candidates. “All of the contenders this year are amazing people who have been involved with Ruff and the community and they all deserve to be crowned Mr Ruff 2017,” Pebbles says. “It’s going to be a very difficult decision, but whoever gets the title will do an awesome job.”

Mr Ruff 2017
The Pint, 455 Abbott St, Vancouver
April 14, 2017, 8pm–3am
www.mnevents.ca

Vote and donate support your favourite candidate. The deadline is April 14 at 5pm.

Contestants pose at the 2016 Mr Ruff competition.
Courtesy MN Events

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Choice events in the city this week

Thursday, April 13

Queer Arts Festival AGM

No, you haven’t slept your summer away. Things are just moving so quickly that it’s already time for the Queer Arts Festival annual general meeting. Looking to get involved or just curious about updates and sneak peeks into this year’s festival in June? Join organizers to find out more about what’s coming up.

7–10pm. Mainspace Amenity Space, 350 East 2nd Ave. queerartsfestival.com

Downtown: Lesbian & Queer Party

One good thing about our city is that when it rains, it pours — especially when it comes to long weekend parties. You’ll notice that 90 percent of this week’s listings are all new, so get out and enjoy. This is one of the newest events in the city, featuring DJs Skylar Love, Krista, Bellaella and ManyBothans. A unique dance experience for Vancouver’s lesbian and queer scene, right in the heart of the Village. Stop saying we’re no fun, for once, and check out something new. Who knows? You may like it.

9pm–2am. Lux Lounge, 1180 Howe St. Tickets $10 online at eventbrite.ca or at the door. facebook.com/events/419374581749313/

Hershe: The Glow Party

Seems like it’s been a while since a rousing Hershe Party — perhaps because spring seems to have forgotten us, so nobody has the spring hornys yet. But Flygirl is about to change all that with a glow party. A real glow-in-the-dark experience with video-mapping of the DJ stage from a Shambhala master, face painters, a glow-in-the-dark art room, and more. Get those white tees and shoes out and paint the glow pants on.

10pm–2am. The Red Room Ultra Bar, 398 Richards St. Tickets online at flygirlproductions.com/.

Friday, April 14

Mr Ruff 2017

It’s hard to believe it’s been six years since the first Mr Ruff event. Half-naked men, jockstraps bulging, go-go bears — no wonder I feel like that hangover lasted months. Now I’m set to do it all again. Who will be adorned with the crown of Mr Ruff — Chris, Jesse, Boy Spence or Addison? All are handsome, most are hairy, and they are all definitely packing. It’s all for a good cause too: donations go to the Vancouver Abbey of the Long Cedar Canoe, a chapter of the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence. Donations can be made online, in person at the event and at performances by the candidates. I think Addison might need a bag for donations, since that jock is already pretty stuffed. See you there; I’ll be the one counting the donations in the jocks. Run, Addison, run.

7:30pm. The Pint, 455 Abbott St. Tickets $20 at Top Drawers, 809 Davie St and online. $25 at the door. Info and voting at mrruff.com/.

Queen Please

Finally, a new night to showcase the raunchiest, funniest, trashiest and most sexually explicit queen around — all in a fun way of course. Can you guess who it is? If I said the woman can deep throat a bottle of beer and pull it out empty, would that be a clue? That’s correct! Joan-E, both with the bottle trick and without, is one of the drag pillars of the Village and always a crowd pleaser. Tonight, she’s joined by Ilona and Coco Klein, so expect the totally unexpected and outrageous.

9:30pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. $5 cover. junctionpub.com/events/queen-please/.

Saturday, April 15

The Chair Series Preview Night

Although the show doesn’t open until next month, these clever people are holding a preview night to get you interested. Then when you bring your friends next month, you’ll be the queen bee for picking a hit. A great concept: individual monologues written for individual actors by John McGie. No props, no set, no costumes. Just words and a chair. Bare bones theatre? Theatre unplugged? Really cheap producers? Take your pick. Some monologues are heartfelt, some hysterical and some hypnagogic, making each showing a roller coaster for the heart and a wonder for the mind. Produced by David C Jones, you already know this monthly endeavour will be a hit. Opening show is Saturday, May 20, continuing the third Saturday of every month. You will laugh, you will cry, and you will order the drink special!

8pm. Seven Dining Lounge, 53 West Broadway St. Tickets $7 at eventbrite.com. Info at facebook.com/events/271231239992813/.

The Judy Show: 2 Fast 2 Judy

We all have one — a Judy that is — and no, Judy is not the special name I give my private parts (that would be Kong.) A Judy is a person with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically outside sexual or family relations. So grab your Judy, or borrow someone else’s for the night, and have fun. Request songs, watch drag, make new friends and make out with cute people. Come in and meet the Judies: Dee Blew, Dust, Amy Grindhouse, Molly Poppinz, Karmella Barr and many others.

9pm–3am. The Odyssey, 686 West Hastings St. Cover $7. facebook.com/events/405193809847172/

DJ G-Luve & Diana Boss

When they talk about that little powerhouse of a DJ that is the King of Funky, they aren’t referring to the smell. It’s the best Funky, Nudisco and House sounds in the city: DJ G-Luve. Tonight with special guest Diana Boss, enjoy a modern, metropolitan atmosphere with a contemporary, urban attitude in a boutique lounge that oozes style, fun and comfort.

10pm. 1181, 1181 Davie St. No cover. facebook.com/1181Lounge

Sunday, April 16

Ninten-Dance

I’ve lived a long time and seen lots of things, but you have to get me pretty wasted to show up at a Nintendo-themed Mario dance party in costume when it’s not even Halloween. Geekenders and the Mushroom Kingdom (now that I know there are mushrooms I understand) are partnering for a party you’ll never forget. Dress up in your best cosplay, enjoy two costume contests (Nintendo-themed costumes and general costumes), or enter a Nintendo trivia contest, all with prizes from Golden Age Collectables and performances by Kitty Glitter, Fiona Ample, Artemis Lark and more.

7pm–1am. The Odyssey, 686 West Hastings St. Cover $15 at door, $12 in costume. facebook.com/events/199522400531863/.

Erase Una Vez: Once Upon A Time

Brought to you by Caliente Night to celebrate International Children’s Day, this event was a hit last year for bringing out the audience’s inner child. Join again or for the first time and reminisce with your favourite childhood characters. Dress as your favourite cartoon character and join the best costume contest.

10pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. Cover $5. junctionpub.com

Monday, April 17

Banks: The Altar Tour After Party

You, me and hundreds of others didn’t get tickets to the sold-out Banks concert tonight, so after standing outside the venue all night trying to catch the sounds, head over to 1181 where DJ Dyco Rake will be spinning the music for the Banks: Altar Tour After Party, where you can pretend you were at the show. Oh, and entry to this event won’t cost you an arm and a leg.

9pm–3am. 1181, 1181 Davie St. No cover. facebook.com/events/1977215875840647/

Launch Party

I thought the change in this night might have been because Del’s Extended Weekend earned him an extended stay on one of those rehab shows, but no such luck. The show has morphed into a new monthly drag night that takes over Del’s spot every third Monday. But have no fear, you won’t be without the Delster too long; he’s the DJ for the night as well — of course. One of the hardest working DJs in the city, he would never abandon his flock. Tonight Coco, Ilona and Del bring you drag magic and spotlight performances by Sherrie Blossom and LUX.

11pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. $5 cover. facebook.com/events/1666428873664842/

Tuesday, April 18

Men 55+

Can’t relate to the spiky-haired, tattooed, jockstrap-wearing twinks who think a dry Manhattan is a place in New York? Join a monthly safe space to talk, listen and share your experiences of conscious aging with other gay men. Topics include isolation, motivation, financial issues, physical health, sex, and more.

7–9pm. #310-1033 Davie St. To register, phone 604-488-1001 or email register@checkhimout.ca. checkhimout.ca

Wednesday, April 19

VML Wings & Pool Social

Spring is when the not-enough-friends blues really hits. Christmas and New Year’s are long gone. Guys that were sedentary during the long lousy weather of early spring are all out jogging, hiking, or biking to get body-ready for Wreck Beach. What’s a guy to do? Get out with a great group of friendly guys who get together every week for a mess of wings and a night of pool, chatting and beverages. It’s a quick and easy way to get involved and make a few new friends. You may even learn a thing or two from the Vancouver Men in Leather.

6–7:30pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St & Pumpjack Pub, 1167 Davie St. vancouvermeninleather.ca/

Think there’s an upcoming event I should attend? Click here to list your event on dailyxtra.com or send me a note at oitc.vancouver@dailyxtra.com.

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Choice events in the city this week

Thursday, April 20

Connect: The Gathering Place’s Annual Art Show

Looking for a diamond in the rough? Some of the talent in this show will floor you. Connect showcases artwork from some of the area’s most vulnerable populations alongside established artists who live or work in the community. Over 200 works of art will be displayed, including paintings, photography, sculpture, pottery and mixed media. Proceeds go to The Gathering Place, which helps GLBT street youth. The show opens tonight, then runs every night until Sunday, April 30.

6–8pm. The Gathering Place Community Centre, 609 Helmeken St. vancouver.ca

Sidekicks Returns

This is a duos-only sketch comedy show — and what better duo than the amazing, beautiful, sexy and vivacious Amy Goodmurphy (and, oh yeah, Ryan Steele.) Ten duos will make you LOL so hard they’ll be selling panty shields in the lobby.

8pm–12am. The China Cloud, 524 Main St. Cover $10. facebook.com/events/1901196503486865/

Friday, April 21

Spring Fling 55+

I’ve always wondered, are these LGBT seniors parties are just coffee, cake and chit chat, or do they all throw their keys and Life Alert buttons into a free-for-all bowl and have some fun? Qmunity’s Spring Fling is a social soiree where seniors and older adults in the LGBTQ community toast the brightening days, the budding freshness of spring, and the early flirtations of summer, among friends, family, and community. Come enjoy an evening of light refreshments and entertainment.

5–8pm. Haro Park Centre Penthouse Suite, 1233 Haro St. This is a free event but please RSVP to eventbrite.ca/e/spring-fling-tickets-33436134378. More at whatsonqueerbc.com/event/spring-fling-55/.

Eye Roll: Another F$%&ing 90s Party

It’s been a quiet couple of weeks on the Cobblah front, but she’s back — and that does deserve an eye roll. Peach Cobblah returns with the 4th edition of this 90s messiness. Along with Peach are Misty Meadows and DJ Jef Leppard. Sweat out that puffy vest, rock out your man capris, and hyperventilate wearing hypercolor. If you’re looking for Peach, she’ll be at the front door eating egg rolls, because she can never get the name of the party right.

10pm. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. Cover $6. facebook.com/events/283183932119723/.

Faux Girls

Coronation may be over — big sigh of relief — but now the events all need a bit of royalty in attendance to make the soiree special. This is Empress XLVI Jane Smokr’s first Faux Girls benefitting the DMS charities, HIM, Zee Zee Theatre, Rainbow Refugee and WAVAW. Maybe you will get to touch the crown, unless Tommy D is playing with it at home again.

10:30pm–12am. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. Cover $5. facebook.com/events/807078056115929/.

Saturday, April 22

Mabel League Kickoff Tournament

None of that West End slow-pitch for this league. This is down-and-dirty fastpitch that will keep your eyes glued to the field. Spring is here and that means the Mabel League is underway with their yearly kick-off tournament. The Mabel League is a softball league for lesbians, bisexual women, queer and trans folk and women allies in the Vancouver area. Come out to the kick-off celebration to play mini ball games with all levels of players, get free t-shirts, and win lots of prizes.

1–8pm. Connaught Park, 2390 West 10th Ave. $25 drop in fee to cover insurance for women not on a team. facebook.com/MabelLeagueFastpitch/.

Gay Music Bingo

If our bingo was like this, we’d have Del Stamp and Robin Graves singing all night with a little Conni Smudge thrown in — that’s when you appreciate alcohol, my friends. Join Mission's gayest bingo callers for an evening of fabulous music bingo, great prizes, fun and lots of laughs! Stay after bingo for dancing till late.

7pm–12am. The Stage in Mission, 32998 1^st Ave, Mission. $5 cover. facebook.com/events/209535969521790/.

Fundraiser For WAVAW

You don’t have to be a woman to support Women Against Violence Against Women. Help the cause by joining Tantra Fitness for a night of intoxicating and empowering performances featuring 14 of the most talented performers in dance, pole and aerial artistry. Please help an amazing cause.

7:30–9:45pm. The Odyssey, 686 West Hastings St. $25 at door. facebook.com/events/1489094034473972/.

Evilyn 13 Birthday Bonanza

Most people age gracefully, a few wrinkles here and there, a few grey hairs, mostly pubes, but I swear Evilyn 13 gets younger every year. Like a fine wine, she just gets better with age. Celebrate this alternative model, fashionista, cosplayer and DJ’s special night.

9pm. No cover. The Hindenburg, 23 West Cordova St. facebook.com/events/1730082297283183/.

Glitter & Skin

I told you Peach is back, and when the Cobblah is around you can count on a lot of nudity — not hers thank God — but other guys. She just has this control over them; the music plays and things start to drop. All amateurs, all bodies and builds, all rhythms, and a lot of smiles. Tonight features a whole new crop of cuties, who will dance, or fumble, or just plain streak to their hearts, and your eyes, content. The makeout corner has returned, just make sure Peach is finished “auditioning” in there.

10pm–2am. The Odyssey, 686 West Hastings St. $7 cover. facebook.com/events/1300614213392405/.

Sunday, April 23

Sing! With Little Shop Of Horrors

I can get into a lot of things, but I just never caught on to a giant singing Venus flytrap. It must just be me, since it keeps coming back. Now you can sing along with the plant and unleash your inner monster, with a sub-titled movie and an entire bar to join in.

6–10pm. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. Entrance by donation. facebook.com/events/699173926936927/.

Investiture 46

Their Most Imperial and Sovereign Majesties Emperor XLVI Tommy D and Empress VLXI Jane Smokr will be announcing their beneficiary charities for the year, and will be bestowing titles to community members and welcoming title holders into the 46th Imperial House of Vancouver — The House of Delusion. Though he would tell you otherwise, when you see his majesty Tommy D out around the village you do not have to bend down on one knee and kiss his ring, or anything else he puts in front of your face. That would be the Pope.

6:30–9:30pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. Cover $5 with all proceeds going to DMS charities. facebook.com/events/240714946400629/.

Monday, April 24

QueerProv Workshop

Think you’re funnier than me? Well, that’s not hard to do: just watch my friend Syd play pool. Drop-in workshops open to the community, facilitated by QueerProv performers and guest teachers, will help heighten and expand your improv skills. Everyone is welcome, and after classes there will be a QueerProv show at XYYVR.

5:30–7pm. Qmunity, 1170 Bute St. $10 drop in fee every 2 weeks. facebook.com/events/1451951268157292/.

Tuesday, April 25

Sounds Like Fire: Femme4Femme

In this femme-focused showcase, witness brilliant magic born of community and coven, care and creativity, among four radical, vulnerable, and fiercely capable femmes: Amber Dawn, Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha, Kama La Mackerel, and Kai Cheng Thom. Thom’s book, a place called No Homeland, launches in Vancouver at this event.

8–11pm. The Cultch, 1895 Venables St. Tickets $15 advance at thecultch.com or $20 at door. facebook.com/events/247455729058321/.

Wednesday, April 26

Flirting With Fido

Every gay guy needs a dog. Large, small, medium, they all attract guys on the seawall if they are cute, cuddly and trained — the dog, that is. Imagine if your cute pooch were trained to go after the cutie you were looking at and tug on his sweats until you came to get him. Dogs have a better track record than eHarmony, and you don’t have to fill out a dozen questionnaires. This non-profit saves and adopts out dogs. Because some of these dogs require training and extensive vet care and new homes, they are throwing a fundraiser to help. TVs will be displaying a list of dogs that are currently looking for home! That home could be yours.

5pm–1am. The Capital, 1178 Davie St. No cover. More info at facebook.com/events/251126665295286/.

Surviving To Thriving

This is a 10-week support group for self-identified lesbian, bisexual, trans, two spirit and queer women who have experienced or are experiencing violence and abuse, including intimate partner violence and childhood sexual abuse. Topics will include forms of abuse, impacts of abuse, personal values, relationships, sex and sexuality, emotions, community, and more. Before registering for this group, all interested participants will be invited to an initial meet-up with the facilitators to assess safety concerns and how they can best ensure safety, support, and confidentiality.

5:30–7:30pm. Battered Women’s Support Services in Vancouver. For confidentiality purposes please call 604-687-1868 ext. 315 to obtain the address. bwss.org/surviving-to-thriving/.

End Of The Rainbow

Back in the days of The Castle and The Royal, drag shows and numbers were classy. No Britney, no Gwen, no Christina, but instead Judy, Barbara, and Patti LaBelle. You haven’t lived until you’ve seen Willie Taylor do Patti better than she could herself. This show promises just that, the life of an icon. Electrifying, intense and real, this production will leave you breathless. End of the Rainbow is a true account of an all-too-mortal goddess on the eve of her destruction. End of the Rainbow surrounds the events of Judy Garland’s last comeback attempt in 1968.

8–10pm. Jericho Arts Centre, 1675 Discovery St. Tickets $25 general, $20 senior/student at brownpapertickets.com/event/2875967. Show runs until Saturday May 20. aceproductions.ca/category/current-shows/.

Gossip Anniversary

Not only is it the third anniversary of Davie Street’s only ’90s/’00s/R&B/dance/hip-hop night, but also the double-header birthdays of DJ about town G-Luve, and the hottie we all want to take home, Todd Hoye. Come wish the boys happy birthday; you may just get a smooch.

10pm–3am. 1181, 1181 Davie St. No cover. facebook.com/events/1444114835887820

Think there’s an upcoming event I should attend? Click here to list your event on dailyxtra.com or send me a note at oitc.vancouver@dailyxtra.com.

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Thursday, April 27

Long Division

Long division brings back nightmares from school; let’s see if Pi Theatre’s version affects me in the same way. Long Division revolves around seven characters at a downtown bar on a complicated anniversary, including a high school math teacher, a soccer-loving Imam, a lesbian bar owner, an aspiring actress, and a single mother working in the corporate world. Through excursions into number theory, geometry, and logic, the players struggle to delineate their evocative, elusive patterns of entanglement, but find that one emotional variable consistently remains unsolved.

8pm. Annex Theatre, 823 Seymour St. Tickets at the door $30. Saturday and Sunday matinees at 2pm for $25. Show runs until Sunday Apr 30. whatsonqueerbc.com/event/long-division/

Spin: Grindr Party

I know you “just go on to look at the pictures.” Really? Now when you see the real thing, you can at least have a drink and move on. This party may be thrown by Grindr but it’s really all about the spin at this new weekly night in the village. New weekly "celebrity" guests from the community join the party as they get their chance to spin their own DJ set, or maybe even pour it up behind the bar. Join for swag giveaways and meet the founder and CEO of Grindr, Joe Simkhai. I bet you all thought it was Del Stamp, but he’s just the top user. Come down and let us see who is celebrity enough to be in the DJ booth.

10pm–2am. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. No cover. facebook.com/xyvancouver/

Friday, April 28

Real Men Real Makeup

Now here is a night I can really get into watching, I love seeing guys squirming as their spot gets closer and closer. A well-timed drink for courage will do wonders for your own private late night showing. Ten average guys dress in drag and put it all on the line for charity. Join in the fun and debauchery by cheering them on out of their comfort zones. Watch the heels get higher and the dance moves dirtier as the guys battle it out to win money for a cause close to their hearts.

7:30pm–2am. The Imperial, 319 Main St. Tickets $25 at eventbrite.ca or $30 at the door. facebook.com/events/1697555460537790/

Hot Bitch Bingo

Surrey drag queens are a wild and crazy bunch, and if they get hold of you, especially in a pack, my advice is to just submit. Tonight the hot bitches and bingo will all be found in a bowling alley, where more than just the holes on the bowling balls will be fingered.

7:30–11pm. Dell Lanes & Lounge, 10576 King George Blvd, Surrey. Free event, but with a 50/50 draw for Surrey Pride. facebook.com/events/178399326001559/.

Robin Hood: Prince Of Tease

Do not mistake this for Robyn Graves, she is much older and that babe gives nothing to the poor. This is a gender swapping, burlesque style musical inspired by the tale of Robin Hood, complete with a tantalizing twist. Robin conspires with her merry (wo)men to take down the tyrannical Prince Joan and her sadistic sidekick, the Sheriff of Nottingham. Robin Hood: Prince of Tease combines circus, the art of burlesque and the storytelling traditions of musical theatre to create an auditory and visual feast. It is a hysterical, over the top and sensual spectacular that will leave the audience on their knees—OK, well that’s more like Robyn Graves—begging for more.

8pm. Performance Works, 1218 Cartwright St. Tickets $29 general, $25 student and senior. More info at facebook.com/events/217861288673509/. Show runs until Saturday, May 13.

Deluxe Edition TGIF: Debut Night

I have to admit, the poster for this event showing Katy Perry in braces brought back bad memories of high school — a fumbling blowjob, braces, my genitals and a lot of blood. Tonight, however, is all about fun and frivolity. DJs Dyco Rake and Skylar Love take to the decks playing the latest and greatest pop/house remixes. There will be pop star themed drink specials, contests and much more. The first 20 people in the door get a TGIF! scratch card for the grand door prize, free drink tickets, or — get ready for it — free coat check!

9pm–3am. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. Before 11pm cover $5, after $10. facebook.com/deluxeeditionyvr

Man Up: Home Alone

This is always a fun night, especially if you take friends who won’t believe the performers are in drag. There's a first time for everything, and this month Ponyboy will be MIA from Man Up. The rabble-rousing drag family is taking matters into their own mischievous hands while Ponyboy is gone, with a no-holds-barred gender fun-fest that even a party dad would surely shiver at. Hosted by Karmella Barr and Johnny B Bad, the plethora of performances will leave you breathless.

9pm–2am. The Cobalt, 917 Main St. Cover $8 before 10pm, $15 after. Pay-what-you-can admission is available. Send an email to get on the list: manupdrag@gmail.com. Info at facebook.com/events/2120675351492056/

Sissy Boy: Glam Babes

So many manly sounding events to go to this week, right? You may have noticed that it was quiet in the village for a while, but Carlotta Gurl is back from her whirlwind European trip with pictures, stories and probably every European STI (they just sound classier in Italian.) Join the Gurl along with Mina Mercury, Mandy Kamp, and the saint of the immaculate dick safari, DJ Del Stamp. Sissy Boy is a throwback to one of the most successful events at the Odyssey from years ago, brought back to life at the new Odyssey by some of the gurlz who started it; yes they have been around that long.

9pm–3am. The Odyssey, 686 West Hastings St. Cover $5. facebook.com/events/1640016206027083/

Saturday, April 29

Queer Jive Lessons

I tend to stay away from Jive, and yes I have a story about it as well. A few drinks in at a ballroom dance event, I tossed my date so hard they took off across the room like a dreidel. Anyone want to be my partner for more lessons; I seem to be free? Not So Strictly Ballroom brings you beginner jive classes to bring out the Ginger Rogers in you. A four week series begins tonight, so see you there.

10–11am. Commercial Drive Legion, 2205 Commercial Dr. Cost $15 drop in. facebook.com/events/803783036436118/

Wild Fruit

The girls are back in town and throwing an LGBTQIA dance party, so it’s time to get too sexy for your shirt. The ’90s best, catchiest, and most obnoxious are back. It’s the home of music that doesn’t take itself too seriously — your secret guilty pleasures and sing-along wonders. No one can hear if you sing like a canary or squawk like a crow, as long as you’re on the dance floor.

10pm–3am. The Odyssey, 686 West Hastings St. Tickets $12 at flygirlproductions.com.

Monarch

The only crowns I ever see are the ones that also have a mouth attached to my dick. Ever wonder what it would be like to be a queen — a real one, Conni, settle down. Monarch is a new monthly event during the 46th reign that will feature everything royal. Sounds by music royalty, a special Monarch shooter, and crowns all over the room so you can get your selfie on — royally. Feature performances by Empress 46 Jane Smoker as well as princesses Kendall Gender and Gia Metric and will be hosted by the boys, Emperor 46 Tommy D and princes Clayton and Sean.

10pm–3am. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. Cover starts at $5 with partial proceeds going to DMS charities. facebook.com/xyvancouver/.

Divine: Drag Disco Party

I have a friend, Art, who pulls off an amazing Divine in drag, though most of the twinks at the bar are too young to know who that is. It entertains us old dogs, though. Tonight launches a new Studio 54 vintage drag and disco party that will transport you into a time warp of opulence, hedonism and whimsy from the ’70s and ’80s. The headmistress of throwbacks — and throwing a few back — Shanda Leer, will host alongside Jef Leppard and Trevor Risk, plus majestic drag hostesses Cinnamon Winters and Poison Apple. Get your furs and your skin tight pants ready because this is a truly transformative party.

10:30pm–2am. Fox Cabaret, 2321 Main St. $12 at door. facebook.com/events/761281647364812/.

Sunday, April 30

Sher

A new monthly peer support group is available the last Sunday of each month exclusively for queer South Asian youth between 16 and 30 years of age, in a safe space to find support, share stories and meet new friends. The group will be led by youth for youth, with facilitators screened by Sher Vancouver. Sher helps to inform, educate, and bring about more acceptance and cross-cultural understanding surrounding LGBTQ issues including bullying, racism, and homophobia.

1–4pm. Please email shervancouver@hotmail.com to get event location. shervancouver.com/.

Sunday Beer Bash

When I grew up in New Westminster there were no gay bars, clubs or gay restaurants around. We lived with the dirty ads in the Georgia Straight, Xtra West and whatever guy tried to pick you up on the street—which happened a lot with all the straight married men in town. It’s nice to see New West branching out with Pride events, bathhouse ads, and now even a Sunday afternoon beer bash. Always handy to have one around the corner from the only bathhouse in town. Win-win situation for me, so let’s have some out-of-town debauchery.

2–7pm. Judge Begbie’s Tavern, 609 Columbia St, New Westminster. facebook.com/events/1865322003730995/.

Sanctuary & The Shequel

Alma is off this week. She’ll be back next week, but you know you’ll need two to fill her boots, Jane Smokr and Gia Metric, both stars of Bratpack. (I was going to say fill her panties, but I think we’d be another two short.) Start off with the amazing Sanctuary, where all sinners can repent and receive cum-munion. Then take that newly waxed butt over to Shequel where the fun continues.

10pm–3am. 1181, 1181 Davie St & XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. Both events no cover. facebook.com/events/980437802092294/

Monday, May 1

Looking For Good Head

I can guarantee that any guy reading this page found this headline in the first half-second. Every guy is looking for good head, but not every guy can give it. Here is the class for you to blow more than your lover's mind. Join for a fun evening of erotic techniques and products that will enable you and your partner to enjoy a heightened level of excitement and pleasure. Watch a few DVD clips of some famous blowjob artists at work and learn some new moves that your mother never told you about. And yes, for those of you curious about where I got my skills, it was at a workshop very similar to this. I can see the line forming already.

7:30pm. The Art of Loving, 369 West Broadway St. Class $35 and please register in advance at artofloving.ca/.

Wednesday, May 3

Cool, Calm And Collected in New Westminster

As if being gay wasn’t enough to cause you to have sleepless nights, suburb life may lend to anxiety as well. In a world full of dating apps, hooking-up, stigma and shame, gay guys have plenty to worry about. For some, anxiety is a sense of apprehension or fear that can lead to repetitive and intrusive thoughts, and difficulty making decisions. For others, it’s an overwhelming sense of panic brought on by many sources of stress. In this four-week experience, you will explore what anxiety means and unpack how to manage it, and take care of yourself and your loved ones. These workshops are open, so participants are welcome to attend any, or all, sessions.

6:30–8pm. Anvil Centre, 777 Columbia St, New Westminster. To register, please email counselling@checkhimout.ca. Info at checkhimout.ca.

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Choice events in the city this week

Thursday, May 4

DOXA Film Festival

This year’s DOXA Documentary Film Festival has an intriguing preoccupation with human-animal hybrids, from mermaids to horse-people. Check out the films Mermaids, Être Cheval, and other queer picks at showings starting today.

Shows May 4–14. See a full schedule of showtimes, or browse through the festival’s queer picks.

An Evening With Ruby Remenda Swanson

Little Sister’s, to me, is one of the best places for a book launch. You can not only listen but also eye-shop all the kinky things you’re normally too embarrassed to look at in daylight. I caught a woman doing exactly that last time I was there; she was more intrigued by the fingertip massage unit than the book. You can do the same tonight if you want, but Ruby Remenda Swanson is far more interesting. Her book, A Family Outing, tells 46 stories about how her son coming out to her led her to become a gay rights advocate.

7:30–9:30pm. Little Sister’s Bookstore, 1238 Davie St. Free. facebook.com/events/1963624373860307/

The Clothesline Swing

And speaking of book launches, journalist, author and Xtra columnist Ahmad Danny Ramadan launches his long-awaited book, The Clothesline Swing, tonight too. Don’t miss his reading from his first novel in English, which he describes as an “epic story of two lovers anchored to the memory of a dying Syria,” and inspired by the Arabian Tales of One Thousand and One Nights.

7pm. The Emerald Supper Club, 555 Gore Ave. Free. facebook.com/events/401262696900270/

Shower Power

I don’t know what the manager of Odyssey is thinking bringing in Alma B Itches as hostess on a night with hot naked men in the shower. That girl can’t tell the difference between acting as hostess and fluffer, though at her house I hear it’s all the same. Come see if the new shower goddess can keep her tongue to herself. For all you Hunter followers, tonight is the big debut reveal (see what I did there?)

9pm–3am. The Odyssey, 686 W Hastings St. Cover $5 or get on guest list at facebook.com/events/1844482229146018/.

Super Gay Bowie Thursday

The first time round, I thought this was a David Bowie tribute night. Nothing could be further from the truth; it’s much better. This monthly event is catching fire quickly with divas, drag queens and hotties in abundance. Performances by Anna May Rogue, Rich Elle, South East and Ilona may be enough for some, but top it off with DJs Del Stamp, Skylar Love, Matthew Hilton and a cherry-busting DJ debut from STILLA, and this promises to be an over the top event.

10pm. Celebrities, 1022 Davie St. Free with RSVP at celebritiesnightclub.com, or bring out the wallet. facebook.com/events/232955387181242/.

Friday, May 5

Boys Gone Wild

Girls Gone Wild videos are all about shy college girls lifting their tops, so it’s safe to assume a Boys Gone Wild wet underwear contest would involve dropping some fabric. That describes half the DJ booths in the Village on any given night, though. Tonight see some wet, clinging, skimpy, stretched-out underwear straining to hold in the goods. Casha Only, Gina Tonic, Sir John Taylor, Mona Funtasy and Brooke Davis will be there to edge everything, or everyone, along. Cover is cheaper than a good bratwurst.

9pm–12am. The Odyssey, 686 W Hastings St. Cover $5. facebook.com/events/203378050170937/

Jungle Party

Break out the loincloth and have a few shots; you may see Ryan Steele as Jane tonight. Victor Venutti and Jorge Mateos are launching their first party of the season, and what better to get people aroused than the wild jungle? Fun, music, jungle costumes, furries, and more. It’s going to be legendary.

9pm–3am. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. No cover. facebook.com/events/659899380878580/.

Sixth Annual Mr/Ms Cobalt Drag Finale

It’s finally here, the night we have all been waiting for, the night the Cobalt Duchess Peach Cobblah offers up the contestants to be the new Cobalt Queen. Head judge Isolde N Barron will cast the others aside to reveal the new monarch. Mr or Ms, all must kneel to the Duchess to be crowned. We’re down to the final nine, but only one can get the honour. It may be one of your favourites; be here to find out.

8pm–2am. The Cobalt, 917 Main St. $10 cover includes your ballot and the dance party. $1 from each ticket will be donated to Rainbow Railroad, a Canadian organization trying to help get LGBT people out of Chechnya. facebook.com/events/287428918350390/

Saturday, May 6

Blue Heron Open House

Okay, I admit it, sometimes I’m not the sharpest tack in the box. After all these posts I think I finally get the name of the group: Blue Heron. Is it because most of the members have “blue hair on”? Today is the open house for the Stanley Park Lawn Bowling Club, and all are welcome to drop by. Get some free instruction, meet the members and try out a bit of bowling, country club style.

11am–3pm. Stanley Park Lawn Bowling Club, 9100 Stanley Park Dr. Map and info at splbc.com/2017_open_house.

BBQ In The Burbs

You’ve tried all the tube steak around town, so why not venture to the burbs and enjoy a new wiener — in your hot dog, that is. This fundraiser is for the Surrey Pride Society, so get out and have a nice road trip topped off with a bit of fun.

11am–3pm. Save On Foods, 9014-152 St, Surrey. facebook.com/events/1770259843287175/.

Spring Thing

Have you ever tried on one of those rubbermen suits? Everyone starts sliding their hands all over you and eventually, some faster than others, your thing does indeed try to spring — hence the name of the event. Have some fun rubbering up, getting into bondage gear and enjoying some other surprises. Come talk about the direction of the club with Reid and the other regular members of the monthly meets. Always welcoming new leather and rubbermen.

2–5pm. Pumpjack Pub, 1167 Davie St. No cover. facebook.com/groups/vancouverrubbermen/.

Cinco De Mayo

I may not be smart, but I do know my dates, some even by name. Cinco de Mayo is the fifth of May, hence the cinco. Maybe this show should be called Seis de Mayo, or maybe that’s just one of the jokes for this comedy show. Hosted by Venezuelan comic Hector Rivas, this annual Latin show is set to be a night to remember. Come join some of the finest international comics who are ready to rock your mundo with laughter. The line-up includes Miguel ‘Pow Wow’ Jordan Ducharme, Alex Rockhill, Antonio Cordero, Steve Venegas Mark O’Keeffe and Andy Cañete headlining.

7:30–10pm. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. Cover $10 at door. facebook.com/events/1903468679931002/.

Madame Gandhi Live

Madame Gandhi is an electronic music artist and activist based in Los Angeles who gained recognition as the former drummer for M.I.A. and as the iconic free-bleeding runner at the 2015 London Marathon. Madame Gandhi now writes music that elevates and celebrates the female voice, making their stage a platform for women’s rights and a message of empowerment.

10pm. The Waldorf, 1489 East Hastings St. Cover $12. facebook.com/events/1771756533137181/.

Monday, May 8

HIV In My Day: Reflecting Back, Looking Forward

Calling all HIV-positive youth and allies. In the early years of the HIV epidemic, Vancouver lost an entire generation of vibrant, young gay men in a very short period of time, often in six months or less from diagnosis until death. This oral history project hopes to document the beginning of the HIV epidemic in Vancouver’s 1980s by having sexual minority men and their caregivers recount their experiences.

6–8pm. Chateau Granville, 1100 Granville St. Free event but must register with williamf@youthco.org or at eventbrite.ca. Info at facebook.com/youthcovancouver/.

NYET Again

In 2013, after Russian president Vladimir Putin introduced his anti-gay "propaganda" laws, one of Vancouver’s local queer theatre companies asked playwrights from all over Canada to create 10-minute pieces in response, which they presented in a one-night cabaret. As a result, Zee Zee Theatre raised thousands of dollars for the Russian LGBT Network. Now, four years later, Zee Zee and Qmunity once again present a cabaret of Canadians concerned about the reported rounding up and killing of gay men in Chechnya. Isolde N Barron and Peach Cobblah will host, featuring new work from Chris Gatchalian, Allan Morgan, Sky Gilbert, Nicola Harwood and more, and a panel discussion on what's happening in Chechnya and how we can mobilize as a community. All proceeds will be donated to Rainbow Railroad, an organization working with the Canadian government to help LGBT people get out of Chechnya.

8–10pm. The Cultch, 1895 Venables St. Tickets $20 at facebook.com/events/1675655426073313/.

Fruit Bowl

It’s the Superbowl for gays: the Fruit Bowl! I may have just stolen a joke, but if not, then QueerProv owes me money. Two teams will be at it again! Who will come out as the cherry on top to claim the coveted Fruit Cup? Hosted by the big fruit Dan Dumsha, who is in charge of keeping order between two rival teams and ensuring the room is filled with laughter. Come down, forget about politics and have some fun.

8–11pm. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. Free admission. facebook.com/events/402810770050548/.

Tuesday, May 9

Lights

It’s another night of comedy, with karaoke fun to follow. Twelve of Vancouver's hottest improv comedians present back-to-back short sketches that have never been performed for an audience before. This could be your chance to see stars in the making. Funny. Weird. Best. Worst. Unforgettable. Unforgivable. You will experience it all at this improvised sketch comedy show.

7:30pm. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. Tickets $5 advance on Facebook site or $8 at door. facebook.com/events/189982014359708.

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Choice events in the city this week

Thursday, May 11

Life Drawing

Straight friends never understand when I tell them where I go, what I do or who I do for fun. Take this night, for example. While they’re at a strip club or watching sports and filling their bellies with 23 cent wings, I’m at a male-only drawing session where the model and the artists are naked as the day they were born. Feel like dropping your gear and letting it all hang out? Just bring your sketch pad, pencils and a towel — hopefully just to cover the jewels. Brought to you by Vancouver Men In Leather.

7–9:30pm. Pumpjack Pub, 1167 Davie St. No cover. facebook.com/VancouverMenInLeather/.

Eurovision 2017 Viewing Party

The first time I watched a Eurovision contest, the drag queen Conchita Wurst kept her beard for the performance. Not just the stray facial hairs like Robyn Graves, but a full-on beard. Alma B Itches must have watched that show too, because looked what happened. There are more drag queens with furry faces than there are lipstick lesbians. Who knows what new trends this three-night party will start. Deluxe Edition Is holding viewing parties of the Kiev 2017 contest tonight, Friday and Saturday, with two big screens.

7pm all nights. 1181, 1181 Davie St. No cover. deluxeeditionyvr.com/.

The Hero Show

It seems like comedy nights are popping up faster than Conni Smudge at a dildo factory. Not that there’s anything wrong with either; everyone needs a good laugh. I am talking about the comedy. Or am I? The Hero Show is back for another hit night of solo sketch comedy featuring the best of the best our city has to offer. Hosted by Cameron MacLeod, joined by Ryan Steele, Jenny Rube, Kyle Fines, Graham Clark and many others. If you’re lucky, you may even sit beside the famous Amy Goodmurphy, who goes to rate Ryan’s performance.

8:30pm. The China Cloud, 524 Main St. $10 admission at door. facebook.com/events/409877722729472/

Friday, May 12

Sweet & Sour

There are two ways you can get me to go out: the promise of naked men, or a stop at a Chinese restaurant. At this night, Kendall Gender, Nate Fader, Guilherme Babilonia and DJ Nick Bertossi bring you an evening of music, men, and hopefully Chinese take-away.

7pm–3am. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. Partial proceeds to the DMS. facebook.com/xyvancouver/.

The Untold Tales Of Armistead Maupin

I grew up in the time Armistead Maupin wrote about in Tales of the City. Unfortunately I was in Vancouver, not San Francisco, so I didn’t experience half the fun or sexual excitement. Watch Maupin tell his story in his own words, in this film by Jennifer M Kroot. A natural born raconteur, Maupin talks about his first sexual experience, and then bursts into the torchy standard, “Is That All There Is?” Heartbreaking and hilarious in equal measure. Part of the DOXA Film Festival.

9pm. Vancity Theatre, 1181 Seymour St. Tickets $11–$15 online at doxafestival.ca/film/untold-tales-armistead-maupin.

Queen Please

Joan-E’s monthly hit night is more like a trip to Las Vegas than Vancouver. And by Vegas, I mean the grittier, dirtier, pornier part of the city. Sometimes that broad could make a trucker blush, and tonight her partner in crime is her drag daughter Valynne Vile. See if the apple doesn’t fall far from the big bush. Always a fun night, but don’t bring granny.

9:30pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. Cover $5 at door. junctionpub.com

Saturday, May 13

Night of 1000—or less—Stars

A night of entertainment to celebrate Christopher Gudgeon’s launch of The Encyclopedia of Lies, as well as to fundraise for two VCC Scholarships in memory of Gudgeon's son and foster son, Keating Gudgeon and Jess Nichol. Craig Northey, Nathan Rogers, Yasuko Than and many more will perform.

6–9pm. Vancouver Community College Auditorium, 1155 E Broadway. Tickets by donation and info at eventbrite.ca.

Red

Always a smash hit and a great fundraiser for the essential Positive Living BC, this event features an all-star cast of local Illusionists, dancers, models, designers, fashion retailers, hair stylists, makeup artists, and much more. All are uniting to support Positive Living’s 5,700 HIV-positive members across BC.

6pm–12am. Harbour Event Centre, 750 Pacific Blvd. Tickets $60 at redvancouver.ca. facebook.com/events/1847203725501373/.

Boots & Buzzcuts

Where else can you go to get both a buzzcut and your boots shined at the same time? Hell, if there were someone giving bikini waxes, you could just lay there and come out a new man. Three bootblacks in attendance — Pup Figaro, Bootblack Everett, and Ariss Bootblack — will treat your leathers and give them some much needed TLC. Marshall and Reuben from the Undercroft Barber Shop will also be there to provide buzzcuts and fades for those needing a trim in time for spring. There will also be hot demos throughout the night, including a forced-shave scene and erotic bootblacking. Brought to you by Vancouver Men In Leather.

8–11pm. Pumpjack Pub, 1167 Davie St. Cover is free if in gear. Otherwise $5 at the door. vancouvermeninleather.ca/.

Fetish Sex-Trava-Ganza

Can you believe this group has been going strong for 16 years of fetish entertainment? Sin City is Vancouver's longest-running, groundbreaking, bar-raising, award-winning fetish night. Featuring guest performer Mimi Cherry from Montreal, Melody Mangler and lots more. A dungeon play area, three DJs, play gear, and fetish performances make this one unforgettable party. Well, that and the rope burns you’ll have in the morning.

9pm–2am. The Imperial, 319 Main St. Tickets $30 at the door or online. facebook.com/events/620952984720061/.

Sunday, May 14

Legends

What do former empresses do? They still get dolled up and work their asses off to entertain us. Jaylene Tyme is a former Empress of Vancouver and a master of illusion, recreating incredible looks including Dolly Parton, Mariah Carey and Tina Turner. Joining her are Mandy Kamp and that cart-wheeler about town Carlotta Gurl.

8–11pm. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. Cover $5. facebook.com/xyvancouver/.

Monday, May 15

Pack a Condom

Want to volunteer? Here’s a spot with hot men, condoms and food. So if you don’t show up, don’t use the excuse that you’re allergic to latex. I said you were packing them, not testing them. Here’s a terrific way to give back to the community. Help cram, stuff, and pack condoms and lube into tight little packages. You must be good at that by now.

6–9pm. Health Initiative for Men (HIM) office, 1033 Davie St. checkhimout.ca/ai1ec_event/condom-packaging-party-14/.

Tuesday, May 16

Pleasuring Prostates

After a long weekend of being prodded, scratched by unkempt fingernails, and hit like a nail — if they even know how to find it — isn’t it time for your prostate was pampered? In this live demo-based workshop by Redrobin, you’ll explore anal and prostate play on men. You can expect to hear about safety, toys and tools, getting over fears and shame, methods, tips and tricks for solo play and partnered play. Did you catch the part about the live demo?

7:30pm. The Art of Loving, 369 West Broadway. Please register 24 hours beforehand at theartofloving.ca. Tickets $50.

Stage Time: Open Improv Jam

Two great shows, Light and Dirty Little Secrets, are holding a night to showcase even more talent, including yours. Play along with your improv hosts in randomly selected teams. Come play with randoms, vets, newbies, and everyone in between. If you’re an improviser, come and jam, or just come to watch and laugh.

8–9:15pm. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. No cover, donations collected at the end. facebook.com/events/104672393433504/

Think there’s an upcoming event I should attend? Click here to list your event on dailyxtra.com or send me a note at oitc.vancouver@dailyxtra.com.

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Thursday, May 18

Key West Cocktail Classic

Like twins separated at birth but following the same path, these two are both writers, comedians and media stars — and one of them is even funny. Decide for yourself which one. Ryan Steele and Bruce Vilanch perform at the fourth annual Stoli Vodka event, the largest LGBT bartender competition in the world. Come see the reigning champ James Rawlings, co-host Patrik Gallineaux and homoculturist Brian Webb as you sample delicious cocktails, vote for your favourites, and have a chance to win a trip to Key West.

7–10pm. Numbers, 1042 Davie St. No cover. First 100 RSVP’d guests receive a Stoli drink ticket plus a wristband to sample all the cocktails and vote. out.com/KeyWestCocktailClassic.

Speed Friending: A Rainbow Refugee Community Event

I may be a bit forward with speed dating, so this may be the way to go; at least I won’t get a drink thrown at me. Join in for a unique night marking the International Day Against Homophobia, Transphobia and Biphobia. Using the method of “speed friending,” Rainbow Refugee members will share their stories with small groups in timed sessions, moving from table to table. There will also be a short film and a chance for further activities and conversations.

7–9pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. Free admission. facebook.com/events/269981346805564/.

Bling: Luscious Moov

When Patricia Raye and Nick Apivor launched the project Luscious Moov, they were inspired to make a room full of people feel sexy and loved. The versatility of the vibes, keys, drums, bass and smoky vocals deliver fresh and exciting arrangements of standards with an added twist of soul, funk, and electronica. Sounds like a perfect way to escape the Top 40.

9pm–1am. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. Tickets $10 at eventbrite.ca. Info at facebook.com/events/203336976847689/.

Friday, May 19

Qmunity IDAHOT Breakfast

This event sounds like a great name for a drag queen, but is actually Qmunity’s benefit breakfast for the International Day Against Homophobia, Transphobia and Biphobia. Stories are important for queer, trans and two-spirit people and communities, to find escape, new meaning and connection; join Qmunity and guest speakers as they share stories of our community, presented by Vancity.

6:45–9am. Fairmont Hotel Vancouver, 900 West Georgia St. Tickets $100 at eventbrite.ca. More info at facebook.com/events/1291478407594638/.

Bianca Del Rio: Not Today Satan

A woman after my own heart, this hilariously hateful comic is known for her foul mouth and unapologetic humour. A self-professed “clown in a gown”, Bianca Del Rio (aka Roy Haylock) continues her worldwide stand-up comedy tour, Not Today Satan, for a second round across North America. If you missed it the first time, you have a second chance to redeem yourself.

8–9:30pm. The Vogue Theatre, 918 Granville St. Tickets $50–$250 at thebiancadelrio.com/tour/. Info at facebook.com/events/1203011123148141/.

The Enchantment of the Arch

It may sound like a convention for podiatrists, but this is actually the Surrey Coronation XIII, which — naturally — takes place in New Westminster. Yes, I do drink a bottle or two of wine doing these listings, but I assure you this is all factual. This night is the Out Of Town Show, Saturday is the Ball, and Sunday is the Victory Brunch.

9pm Friday. Columbia Theatre, 530 Columbia St, New Westminster. Tickets for Out Of Town Show, $15.

5pm Saturday. Columbia Theatre, 530 Columbia St, New Westminster. Tickets for the Ball, $60.

11am Sunday. Heritage Grill, 447 Columbia St, New Westminster. Tickets for the Victory Brunch $20.

All tickets at epama.ca/ball2017.htm. Event info facebook.com/events/1817088968565521/.

Backdoor: Last Chance

Some places come and go, replaced by something new, but this time one of the most unique venues in the city will be closing its doors for good. Backdoor was Matt Troy’s special baby, the party that changed everything. This is your last chance for a little Backdoor fun, and if you’re like me, the last chance to go after that hottie Matt Troy’s own rear entrance. Everyone is welcome, daddies, grannies, freaks and treats, to enjoy deep penetrating bass with three rooms of dancing. Organizers promise crazy out of this world art installations to make you gag, and wild, hidden intimate spaces to keep you gagging.

9pm–3am. Vancouver Art and Leisure, 1965 Main St. Tickets $30 at residentadvisor.net with limited tickets at door. facebook.com/events/1490225211039274/.

Saturday, May 20

The Chair

If you were at Red last week and saw David C Jones on stage, you’ll find it hard to imagine someone that energetic just sitting in a chair performing (unless it’s a rim seat, but that’s a different show altogether.) This concept is hilariously dramatic, at times shockingly surreal, but one of the best nights of unexpected entertainment you will experience, organizers promise. Eight actors get The Chair and bring John McGie's words to life, sometimes with wild comedy sketches, sometimes with touching short dramas.

8–11pm. Seven Dining Lounge, 53 West Broadway St. Tickets $10 at door. eventbrite.com/e/the-chair-sat-may-20th-tickets-33451469245?aff=eac2.

Bears Night Out

Hibernation is over; bears are hungry, horny and on the hunt. If you’re looking for unpretentious, unadulterated, in your face fun, then this is the place to be. Twinks, muscle daddies, grand daddies, boys, tall, short, hairy or smooth, there is a horny bear just waiting to feast. Head bear hunter DJ Del Stamp keeps the pace going and the dancing bears grinding on stage. This is the night I get to feel like a hunk of meat just waiting on the buffet line to be eaten.

9pm. Pumpjack Pub, 1167 Davie St. $5 cover after 9pm. pumpjackpub.com/.

Tease: Alyson Calagna And Del Stamp

If the event is called Tease then you know two things: Del Stamp will be involved, and somebody will be on their knees in the DJ booth. The tease is, will it be you? Love and Freedom Events is excited to bring DJ/Producer Alyson Calagna back to Vancouver with DJ Del Stamp for a very special opening set, inspired by Alyson's sound. Expect infusing house, tech house and more into sets that are groovy, bouncy and fun! Some people called Alyson’s set during last year’s Big Pride Weekend the musical highlight of Pride.

10pm–3am. The Odyssey, 686 W Hastings St. Tickets $15 and more info at facebook.com/LoveAndFreedomEvents/.

Sunday, May 21

Absolut T-Dance; Out For Kicks BBQ

Back in the day — yes my day: I’m old get over it — T-Dances were the best parties around. They were so popular and fun that we would even drive to Seattle just for the Sunday Timberline T-Dances and they would be packed. It’s time to get that tradition back. The Out For Kicks Soccer club starts us off right, and hopefully they will be in full gear, including Luke and Dave’s famous short shorts. Come support the club and meet some of the hottest jocks around, you know they can go for hours, running or anything else you might want to do.

3–7pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. $10 entry gets you a drink, Absolut of course, and a burger. facebook.com/events/263827534020861/

Diva’s Den

This isn’t for me, but I can’t let my followers miss out on this annual women-for-women strip show fundraiser for the Vancouver Dyke March. Wanda and June will be your hosts for this show that encourages amateur and professional performers to get on stage and let loose for charity in a safe and supportive environment. Diva’s Den and the Vancouver Dyke March are trans-, gender-nonconforming-, intersex-, and queer-inclusive. They encourage each person to decide for themselves if they belong in a “women for women”-centred space. ID checked for age, not gender marker. Transphobia will not be tolerated.

7:30–11pm. The Penthouse, 1019 Seymour St. Tickets $20 at Little Sister’s, 1238 Davie St, JQ Clothing, 2120 Commercial Dr or $25 at the door. facebook.com/events/982307251871235.

Ruff At The Pint

If you haven’t been to a Ruff party yet, you’re in for a treat. It’s always a room full of hot, horny, shirtless, sometimes pantsless, handsome men just waiting to have some fun. Air thick with so much testosterone even Conni Smudge could grow a beard. MN events always knows how to throw a great long weekend party, and you do have Monday off to recover so what are you waiting for? With performances by Mr Ruff 2017 Jesse, Colin, Anuar, Quincy, Chris and Addison, if your shorts aren’t soaked then better have your Cowper’s Glands checked out. DJs Nick Bertossi and Nark keep the action moving and the men sweating all the way to the after party at Steamworks, just up the street. Because after all that, you’ll definitely need a shower and a blow dry.

9pm–3am. The Pint, 455 Abbott St. Tickets $20 at Top Drawers, 809 Davie St and online mnevents.ca or $25 at door. facebook.com/events/242728429529731/.

Aja Live: Saturday and Sunday Shows

If you couldn’t catch Aja on Saturday night then don’t let this night pass you by. Tommy D may now be queen — oops emperor — of Vancouver, but that doesn’t mean he’s resting on his rather large laurels. OUTtvGo and TFD Presents are bringing you even more drag fantasy featuring fan favourite Aja of RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 9. She’s carrying, henny — don’t miss out on what will be the true gaggarini of 2017. And if that isn’t enough to get you here, a double show with Legends and Shequel follows after that. Thank god there is an ATM in the bar.

9pm–4am. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. Tickets $25–$35 at eventbrite.ca. Info at facebook.com/events/1727919160839492/.

Babes on Babes: Von Kiss

Babes on Babes is a collective of artists, DJs and promoters who showcase and celebrate local and international queer talent. Von Kiss is a DJ who can move the masses. Based out of LA with residencies in Vegas, San Diego and San Francisco, she has talent that comes from years of rocking shows all across the globe. Frankie Teardrop is a DJ, producer, and promoter in Montreal's underground queer party scene. With these two along with DJs Jane Blaze, O-Show, Angle, Ethan, Cho Cha and Leahbabe, the three rooms promise to be rocking with everything you like.

9pm–2am. Fortune Sound Club, 147 E Pender St. $15 at door. facebook.com/events/811590135665977/.

Hershe Bar

Okay, Hershe Bar has definitely come a long way since the old days, and good on her. I heard a rumour that tonight there will be shower dancing and, if coaxed enough, Leigh Cousins may take a spin on the shower pole. Go for it, doll! DJs Soulfunkee and Miss M will keep the dance floor, and other things, bouncing to your heart’s content.

10pm–2am. The Odyssey, 686 W Hastings St. Tickets $12-15 at eventbrite.ca. More info at facebook.com/events/1984972821732178/.

Spanglish

A night dedicated to the modern art of mixing two languages together. If there is Spanglish, is there also Franglish, Italglish or Polglish? Caliente Nights’ resident team will be joined by your reigning Miss Gay Latina BC, Rebecca Wolf, and Ms Gay Vancouver 37 Casha Only to bring you performances that celebrate the collision of languages. If you can understand the words then you have had too much to drink.

10pm–3am. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. $5 cover. facebook.com/events/1319814214795986/.

Monday, May 22

Holly Near and Tori Trujillo

Holly Near has been singing for our lives for over 45 years, and is still speaking and singing out about the times we live in right now. As an acitivist and a skilled performer, she puts on a great show reflecting on the world in which we live, and the complexities of love and integrity. Tori Trujillo was raised on everything from Motown and Carole King to Mexican band music and Bob Seger, with a heavy influence of gospel greats like Mahalia Jackson. Put the two together and you have a show that will raise the roof.

7pm. St James Community Square, 3214 W 10th Ave. Tickets $30–$45 at soundsandfuries.com/concerts.html.

Wednesday, May 24

WE Arts: Dance In Transit

Looking to show off the goods? Dance in Transit has come up with free outdoor dance events this spring and summer in four amazing downtown venues: Robson Square, Jim Deva Plaza, Queen Elizabeth Plaza, and Plaza of Nations. They’re meant to build community involvement, expand social networks, ease people away from their digital devices, and get back to face-to-face connection. It’s a free event open to the public. Join to volunteer, participate, or just hang out and watch.

8pm–11pm. Robson Square Rink, 800 Robson St. Details and sign up at meetup.com/Vancouver-Lifestyle-Club/events/239967211.

The Princess Show

This is right up Alma B Itches’ britches. A sequined and bearded Princess Edward who journeys into a world where anime heroes, bass guitarist rock stars and pop epics meld into a music-filled thriller. Princess Edward is an alter ego of Aaron Collier, former keyboardist for The Jimmy Swift Band and founding member of the electronic duo Scientists of Sound. This show is a mashup of Dungeons & Dragons, Attack on Titan, Zelda and RuPaul’s Drag Race. The setting is fantasy but the problems the Princess encounters are very real to all of us. Show runs until Saturday, May 27.

Various times, 7pm to 9:45pm shows. Vancouver Culture Club, The Cultch, 1895 Venables St. Tickets $15–20. Showtimes and tickets at upintheairtheatre.com/the-princess-show.

Think there’s an upcoming event I should attend? Click here to list your event on dailyxtra.com or send me a note at oitc.vancouver@dailyxtra.com.

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Thursday, May 25

Chicks With Picks

Yes, they said picks. This is a singer-songwriter series, not Xtube. Girlgig Productions brings you Summer Osborne and Sarah McCracken with guests Hannah Dyson and Silent MartI for one night only. Education of the soul, one song at a time.

7pm. Fairview Pub, 898 West Broadway St. Cover $10. facebook.com/girlgigproductions/

The Hunger Room

Staircase Theatre proudly presents the world premiere of Scott Button’s The Hunger Room, a dark thriller directed by Stephen Heatley. A crisis takes over a suburban high school when a mysterious stalker begins delivering notes written in blood to female students. I have goosebumps already.

8pm. Tuesdays through Saturdays, until Wednesday, June 7. PAL Studio Theatre, 8th floor, 581 Cardero St. Tickets $17–$22 at staircasetheatre.com.

Vancity Street

I always thought having a designer for a partner would be pretty cool; all my clothes would be tailor made for free and I could even get them adjusted before and after the Christmas piggy days. They always get scared off, though, when they see I’m seven feet tall. For you shorter folk, here is your chance to bag a designer at a night of fashion and style featuring local acts, street style vendors and designers for the underground runway, including up and coming headliner Adam.

8pm–2am. Are You MIA, 350 Water St. Tickets $10, and info at facebook.com/events/1299379510099526.

Mixtape: Your First Mix

Remember making a mixtape to express your feelings to your first crush, only to find out that ten songs of Tina Charles or Vicki Sue Robinson told your prom date that you were gay and she wasn’t getting laid for prom after all? Tonight, the Hero Show may bring back those memories at a brand new show that brings comedy and music together into a strange hybrid alien baby. Tonight’s show is stacked with a plethora of comedians including Ryan Steele and Amy Goodmurphy. There will even be a visit by Vancouver’s all-female comedian choir; I lie not.

8:30–11:15pm. The China Cloud, 524 Main St. Cover $10 (that’s like fifty cents a comedian). facebook.com/events/1867452806909937

Spin: Round 3

It’s round three already and I haven’t had the balls to get in the booth and spin a set; I wouldn’t even be hidden because my head would be two feet above the glass. Guest DJs from around the community join in for a shot in the booth and to spin their own sets. This week features Pol Harrison at 12:30am and the one and only Kendall Gender closes the night with her own set at 2am. Resident DJ Rafael Calvente of Brazil will also be spinning music to get you moving with a sound you won't hear anywhere else in the city.

11pm–3am. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. No cover. facebook.com/xyvancouver/

Friday, May 26

Nothing’s Hotta Than Dinner With Carlotta

This is going to be a cheap dinner. I mean, the gurl has two tic-tacs and a cube of ice and is full. Have you seen those legs? Rub them together and you have a hell of a bush fire on your hands. She’s joined by Miss M, Mandy Kamp and Mina Mercury, so this week’s theme must be M. Dine and drag with the cream of the crop, but watch out, if you choke while laughing and eating, Carlotta Gurl will probably give you mouth to mouth.

7pm meet and greet the Queens. 8pm show. The Village Restaurant, 1143 Davie St. Reservations recommended. facebook.com/carl.mcdonald.90

Strut Pre-Party With Spectrum

Before you freak out because you haven’t found just the right heels for the walkathon, this is just a pre-party to get you going before the actual event Saturday, June 3. Spectrum Events Group will be putting together a team to walk in Strut Vancouver, as well as throwing a fundraiser party with three DJs, entertainment, and more. Strut members will be joining in, wearing their fabulous heels and sharing how to get involved or join Spectrum’s team. Come out early and support this amazing cause, check out some killer shoes, and get your dance on.

8–11pm. Are You MIA, 350 Water St. Free cover if you donate $10 to the team walking. Come with pledge sheets that have $10+ donated or join the team and pledge $10. facebook.com/events/208541389652665

Man Up: May Musicals

Musical theatre geeks rejoice! A new lineup of tributes, recreations, and reimaginings from the famous classics all the way to the way-off-off-off-Broadway obscurities is back. Man Up brings you some of the best drag kings around to do homage to the gayest of gay musical numbers. Joining them will be the Leaping Thespians bringing you ridiculously funny theatre.

9pm–2am. The Cobalt, 917 Main St. Cover $8 before 10pm, $15 after. facebook.com/events/1191262100984515

Bye Bye VAL Part 1

This is a sad weekend for a lot of people. Vancouver Art and Leisure is open for a last party that is so big it encompasses tonight and Saturday. Two full nights of amazing talent in seven rooms of art, music and leisure. It has been two years of many memories and this will be the last opportunity to experience it before they move on to a new pop-up model that may be be new, exciting and fun but won’t be the incredible space that beats with a heart of its own at 1965 Main. Good luck to Matt Troy; I know we all wish you well in whatever you do.

10pm–3am, both nights. Vancouver Art & Leisure, 1965 Main St. Friday info at facebook.com/events/219758218524976/. Saturday info at facebook.com/events/292150014570747/.

Divas at the Junction

Drag queens are usually so perfectly made up you can’t tell their age — well unless they’ve had a few too many cocktails (sorry Conni). Take Sienna Blaze for example. Tonight is her birthday diva show and most of the time she looks like a pubescent teenager. Join her together with Glitteris and Misty Meadows, and let me know what you think. Maybe they have a curfew to be in bed by midnight. Any takers?

10pm–3am. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. Cover $5. facebook.com/events/306237913145134/?active_tab=about

Bye Felicia with Will Sheridan

Doesn’t this damn Felicia ever leave? To be honest, no one has ever said this to me, so I must be doing pretty well. In this show, saying “Bye Felicia” is all about saying goodbye to negativity. After coming out in a lengthy ESPN story titled “Will Sheridan: I'm Proud Of Who I Am,” former basketball star Will Sheridan has undoubtedly become a public figure in the LGBT community and one of the top DJs around. Hosted by Alma B Itches along with special guests Ilona Verley and DJ G-Luve, come by, leave all negativity outside and just enjoy.

10pm–3am. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. Tickets $10–$12 at eventbrite.ca/e/bye-felicia-wwill-sheridan-nyc-tickets-34529190739.

Saturday, May 27

Loli*Pop: High Society

“Loli” means a sexual attraction to women who portray themselves as younger than their age and “innocent.” Kind of sounds like Carlotta Gurl is at it again. Come join Coco and Ilona and experience their version of high society along with performances by Synthia Kiss, Eva Scarlett, Molly Poppinz and more. It sucks to suck, so let them show you the right way to suck.

9pm–3am. The Odyssey, 686 West Hastings St. Cover $7. facebook.com/TheOdysseyBar/

Underwear or not to Wear

That is the question. Get your skivvies out, the less material the better. It’s your choice of banana hammock, budgie smuggler, grape smuggler, manties, tighty whities, crotchless, assless, jockstrap, thong or knickers as long as they are holding the jewels in place. Even better if the jewels are swinging free; I’ll be there practising my testicular inspection technique, no need to cough.

9pm–3am. The Pumpjack Pub, 1167 Davie St. Cover $5 after 9pm. pumpjackpub.com/

Sunday, May 28

Rainbow Afternoon Beer Bash

Looking for a new bear or cub to train? Travel just a bit out of your comfort zone and discover that New Westminster is the place to be. This monthly event will be on the last Sunday of every month. Show up, grab a drink, make some new friends or reconnect with some old ones. They will also be collecting toonies for New West Pride.

2–7pm. Judge Begbie’s Tavern, 609 Columbia St, New Westminster. No cover. facebook.com/events/307951876294328

SLAM

Wham, bam, slam me man. Looking for a room full of jocks, the breathing kind not the dirty kind? Well, there may be quite a few of those as well. This is, after all, a room full of baseball players. Now is the time to be an athletic supporter for the travelling softball teams raising money for tournament travel. Prizes, draws, entertainment, games and loads of jocks to try to bag.

3–7pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. $10 gets you a barbecue burger, a draft or a pop. junctionpub.com/events/go-slam/

Sanctuary Second Anniversary

It’s hard to believe it’s been two years since this night started. Alma was just a wee thing with barely a goatee back then. Now look at the bearded queen! Tonight Alma brings back the original guest from the first show, current reigning Vancouver drag superstar Kendall Gender, and now it’s legal for her to get in. In this church, you’ll be sweating out those sins on the dance floor as DJ Rafael offers all you heathens cummunion after the show.

11pm–2am. 1181, 1181 Davie St. No cover. facebook.com/events/1981796002041606/?active_tab=about

Monday, May 29

Get Stumped

This event title is literal; trust me, I know. I went hoping it was something altogether dirty and different, but alas it was a game show. But it was lots of fun after all! General knowledge, picture and movie clips and fun games to win prizes. Let your host Richard Romano test your skills or maybe you can even stump him. Still no hidden meaning, guys.

7:30pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. No cover. junctionpub.com/events/get-stumped-trivia-2017-05-29/

Tuesday, May 30

Femmes Night Out

Time to pamper the drag queen in your life, or maybe just your own inner one. Hosted by the Gallery of BC Ceramics, a new pop-up called Femmes Night Out celebrates the love of all things femme — all genders welcome. There will be cocktails, a braid and nail bar, lots of spectacular ceramics, and Divine’s Disco Album on repeat. Treat yourself to gorgeous ceramic jewellery by David Robinson, Amy Chang and Heather Lippold. Beautify your space with bud vases from Diane Espiritu and Anyuta Gusakova and functional ware from Amelia Butcher.

7–10pm. Gallery of Ceramics, 1359 Cartwright St. Free admission. facebook.com/events/140384166502338/?active_tab=about

Wednesday, May 31

Wing Social with Vancouver Men in Leather

Looking to join or socialize with Vancouver Men In Leather but don’t know how to get started? The best way to a leather bear or man’s heart is with wings — BBQ, teriyaki, S&P, honey garlic or your own special coating. Every Wednesday VML members get together at Junction to chow down and chat over wings and drinks, then head over to Pumpjack for an evening of pool and fun. Drop by and you’ll be surprised at how fast you are pulled into the fold. All are welcome so don’t be shy.

6–7:30pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. Only cost is what you eat and drink. vancouvermeninleather.ca/events/

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Choice events in the city this week

It’s June and Pride is only nine weeks away. What’s that thing bothering you in the back of your mind? It’s that you haven’t sent me your Pride listings or Pride pictures! Don’t wait another day. If you have anything associated with Pride, a party, AGM, march, dance, group or get together, send it along to me at oitc.vancouver@dailyxtra.com. Don’t be one of those people who remembers the day after your event!

Thursday, June 1

Clean as a Whistle

Thursdays are like Superman’s Bizarro world at the O. The men in the shower are shaved, waxed or plucked from chest to nethers, including the crevices and dangly bits, while the queen of the roost, Alma B Itches, has enough hair in her beard to keep a small village warm in winter. But it works! With Alma around you know there will always be surprises, and they will usually fit in a shower stall.

9pm–3am. The Odyssey, 686 W Hastings St. Cover $5. facebook.com/TheOdysseyBar

Spin with DJ Mental Metric

Summer is here and the best patio on Davie is open — and it’s high above the street to keep you safe and uninterrupted, if not sober. DJ Rafael Calvente is spinning in the back lounge and this week is joined by special guest DJ Gia Metric. Wake me up on the patio when it is time to go home.

11pm–3am. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. No cover. facebook.com/xyvancouver

Friday, June 2

Scene Kid: Emo Dance Party

An EMO party brings back thoughts of the softcore punk of years past, unenthusiastic melodramatic 17 year olds who don’t smile, high pitched overwrought lyrics and inaudible guitar riffs, tight wool sweaters, tighter jeans, itchy scarves, ripped converse high tops, black square rimmed glasses, and ebony greasy unwashed hair. This time though, for me anyway, alcohol is going to play a big part of the night. Sad boy DJ Harris will be on deck for this black parade with Rose Butch, Dee Blew and Grimm waking us up inside with some sad performances. Motto for the night: Expect sins, not tragedies.

9pm–3am. The Odyssey, 686 W Hastings St. Cover $7. facebook.com/TheOdysseyBar

Wet & Wild

For those of you who like your men on the opposite side of the spectrum from the other shower nights in town, you’ve come to the right place. Big, hairy, muscle daddies who look like they’re going to jump out of the shower and ram you in one thrust: all before you put down your drink. Go-go bears and cubs with packages so big at eye level you’re lucky to leave with both eyes intact. With tattooed DJs and bartenders whose butts you can bounce a loonie off into the tip jar, this is a one stop shop with something for everyone. Especially me.

9pm–3am. Pumpjack Pub, 1167 Davie St. $5 cover. pumpjackpub.com

Frisky Friday

If you are only frisky on the first Friday of every month, chances are you’re married, so leave the spouse at home and get frisky with Sienna Blaze and Kendall Gender, the girls who never say no (to doing a drag number). DJ Miss M will hit the decks, the floor will be packed and your mojo will kick in. Maybe it will even stay a few days.

9:30pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. $5 cover. junctionpub.com/events/frisky-friday-2017-06-02/

Saturday, June 3

Strut

All guys should wear heels from time to time; you’ll finally be tall enough to kiss me. Plus your thighs get larger and your butt sticks out. Save on gym time and start strutting! What better way to start than with this fundraiser that lets you walk a mile in someone else’s shoes for a change? Strut is an annual walk-a-thon that raises funds to support sponsorship groups and charities that assist LGBT+ refugees and newcomers.

12pm. Sunset Beach, 1050 Beach Ave. Register as a walker here or pledge to a person or team and just go watch the guys strut by. strutvancouver.ca/

June Mosh

What’s almost as good as a stripper in heels? A Van-Pah puppy in heat. The temperature is supposed to climb this weekend, and it’s perfect mosh-time. Those pups will need belly rubs aplenty, and you know what heat and belly rubs bring you — a humping good time. Everyone is welcome from pets to handlers to the curious. Enjoy some time on the mats or get to know your fellows in the pets and handlers community. You’ll find pups romping around, playing with toys and having an all-around blast while handlers socialize and play with the pups and kitties and all the other pets. Always remember gear is admired but never required!

2–4pm. The Pumpjack Pub, 1167 Davie St. No cover. facebook.com/groups/vanpah/

Vancouver Rubbermen June Moon

If you are one of those guys who only gets laid in a blue moon, you’d better stop and reevaluate your habits, since the next blue moon isn’t until January, 2018. June moon will have to do, so get on your rubber and let’s get lucky. Have some fun rubbering up, getting in bondage gear and enjoying some other surprises. Come and talk about the direction of the club with Reid and the other regulars.

2–5pm. Pumpjack Pub, 1167 Davie St. No cover. facebook.com/events/1465246263550569/

The Drag Show

I have a soft spot for the quintessential drag queens who work nonstop for the community through rain, sleet, snow and heat: just like the mailman. Mailmen don’t have the same pitfalls, though, since heels just aren’t that safe in all weather. As for the heat, I have seen many a queen look like they are melting away. But it’s not all bad; sometimes the melting fills in the crevices like putty. That reminds me, how is Myria doing? Tonight, enjoy some time away in the burbs as Mz Adrien and guest divas bring you comedy and female impersonation like no others.

7pm–1am. The Stage, 32998- 1st Ave, Mission. Tickets $10 advance online or $15 at the door thestageinmission.ca

Ladies Summer Party in the Burbs

Don’t wait for another Hershe Bar to find your summer fling. Head out to the burbs where the ladies don’t know you, but want to, at this summer-themed women-only party. Get out your summer wear and flip flops. Come out and enjoy the evening with friends and dance the night away to the fantastic spinning of Wicked Wanda—I dare you to ask how she got her name.

7:30pm. Wilde Oscar’s Pub, 45886 Wellington Ave, Chilliwack. Tickets $15 at the door or $10 advance at lesbiansinthevalley@outlook.com. More info at facebook.com/groups/outinchilliwack

FuKR Jock/Harness Dance Party

Why is it that when the heat comes out so does all the leather? I know it’s great to wear and to feel against the skin, but heat, sweat, leather and more than two guys and it gets kind of funky. You can’t really break out the spray bottle of leather “Smell Be Gone” and start spraying it around like a Febreze fairy, so maybe a few of those well placed pine tree hanging deodorizers will be the fix. Sex-toy shaped deodorizers? Cha-ching! Tonight is the perfect butch night to try it out. Music this month is by DJ Jeff Dority of Pure Noise from Seattle along with John “Bubba” Hanley in the shower for a win-win scenario.

10pm–3am. The Odyssey, 686 W Hastings St. Tickets $10 at eventbrite.com

Sunday, June 4

Queer ASL Bowling

Join in or volunteer at this night of bowling for the deaf queer community and Queer ASL students. Queer ASL is an anti-oppressive, trans and queer positive environment with a focus on creating an accessible, affordable, safer space for ASL learners.

6–8pm. Grandview Bowling, 2195 Commercial Dr. More info through the week at facebook.com/queerasl/

Cher & Friends

After 50 some years of Cher performing, what could any drag queen show us that would be new? How about if this version of Cher performs live? What if this Cher isn’t a drag queen at all but a baker and owner of Fairy cakes and Chomp Vegan Eatery? Find out who does it better at this fundraiser for the BC SPCA, complete with drag, comedy, a silent auction, live impersonations, and so much more. Hosted by the Whoopsie Daisy, featuring Cera Rivers live as Cher, and with many special guests. This is going to be the most fun you have all year.

7:30pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. Tickets $15 at door or $12 advance at Fairy Cakes, 3586 Fraser St. junctionpub.com/events/cher-friends/

Monday, June 5

Queer Prov Workshop

With so many comedy shows popping up around town, especially in the village, why not try your luck and see if you can be the next Ryan Steele? Learn the art at this drop-in workshop open to the community, facilitated by QueerProv performers and guest teachers to help heighten and expand your improv skills. This week's workshop will be instructed by the wonderfully hilarious Jamie Chrest.

5:30–7:30pm. Qmunity, 1170 Bute St. All are welcome, $10 drop-in every two weeks at Qmunity, before the QueerProv show at XYYVR. facebook.com/queerprov/

Tuesday, June 6

Coming Out and Outcomes

Everyone has a coming out story. Learn from others, take their lead and advice to make sure you get the outcome you desire. It’s a moment in time you will always remember so let’s make sure it’s a good memory. The topic this time is coming out, and how doing so or not doing so has affected your life. Share your thoughts at this discussion night. Snacks provided. Mpowerment events are planned by and for young men who are gay, bi, or queer. They invite all guys who like guys and their friends to attend.

6:30–9:30pm. Mpowerment Headquarters, 205–568 Seymour St. facebook.com/MpowermentYVR/

Cock And Ball Play: Live Demo

Picture it, your date has been great and you are about to have what you imagine will be the best sex ever. He reaches into your shorts and grabs Joe and the twins, and you feel nothing but pain as he fumbles and squeezes, mistakes your moans of agony for pleasure and goes at the family jewels again. If he’s cute you may take it. If he’s handsome you may take him to this workshop. In this live demonstration-based workshop, you’ll explore fun and sexy ways to tease, please, and play with cocks—and their buddies, the nards of doom! Toys, tools and techniques with hands — Oh my! Sign me up.

7:30pm. The Art Of Loving, 369 west Broadway St. Cost $50 for workshop, please register in advance online. artofloving.ca/seminars/seminar-topics/cock-and-ball-play

Shame Spiral

Peach Cobblah is on safari in Africa, and while she’s gone Alma B Itches has been left in charge. So be afraid, be very afraid. Joining Alma tonight is living legend Carlotta Gurl, who thankfully hasn’t hit anyone (yet) with an 1181 cartwheel. Throughout the show, audience members pull songs from a blender and the results has been entertaining audiences for over three years. See if you can find the most outrageous song of all to put in the blender.

10pm–1am. 1181, 1181 Davie St. No cover. facebook.com/events/1404993939540054

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Ted witzel’s LULU is inspired by Europe’s thriving sex culture

Major cities exist across the globe that are home to sex-positive, progressively-minded venues that offer safe spaces for queers to express their sexualities without inhibition or fear of judgment. While Toronto has a handful of bathhouses and fuck-friendly bars that continue to survive despite relentless gentrification, the city remains devoid of the large-scale, sex-positive parties associated with cities like New York City, Paris, Amsterdam and Berlin.

Playwright ted witzel has been an artist-in-residence at Buddies in Bad Times Theatre since 2014 and hopes to make a dent in Toronto’s staid sex scene with his new project. The next instalment of his multi-part theatre series LULU — inspired by queer German playwright Frank Wedekind’s Lulu plays (Earth Spirit, Pandora’s Box) — returns to Buddies with a full-facility warehouse-style party in the vein of Berlin’s Berghain and Kit Kat clubs for one night during Pride Month. LULU v6 All The Fucks I Never Gave is a continuation of the experimental theatre series and is presented by witzel’s theatre company the red-light district.

The artist, who divides his time between Berlin and Toronto, hopes the event will give the local queer community the jump-start it desperately needs.

“Torontonians aren’t notoriously great at letting go and not giving a fuck,” witzel says. “People give a lot of fucks here and I wanted to create a night where people would feel free to step in and lean into an experience, like sex-forward. That doesn’t mean you have to be banging someone in the bathroom, although you could. Who am I to say you shouldn’t?”

With the lion’s share of Toronto’s nightlife scene aimed at providing men who have sex with men venues in which to socialize and hook up, All the Fucks I Never Gave is focused on providing a space for trans people and queers of every stripe a night of pure indulgence and inclusion.

Courtesy Helen Yung

Parts of the theatre will be repurposed as dark rooms and for peepshows and the emphasis is on creating a safe, consensual space for people to observe and engage in a sex-positive environment.

The playwright wants to bulldoze through the withdrawn, polite atmosphere he says is prevalent in Toronto’s local queer scene with his event and encourage people to glance up from their cellphone screens.

“People tend to hide in their phones when they want to hit on people,” witzel says. “In Berlin, someone will look you in the eye when they want to fuck you and I wanted to create a room where people could, you know, quite possibly go home with someone. If not, they’re also in an environment that’s asking them to encounter it with their sexuality.”

Top-tier DJs Denise Benson, Dre Ngozi and Karim Olen Ash have worked closely with the red-light district team to design a soundscape more in line with Berlin’s early-morning queer warehouse parties.

With oyster bars and on-site tattoo artists and stylists at the ready to primp up looks in need of an extra sparkle, All the Fucks I Never Gave looks to be the Pride party Toronto never had.

While there is no dress code in effect, people are strongly encouraged to put some thought into their outfits, even if that means showing up naked. Witzel hopes to emulate the infamous Berlin KitKatClub's approach to wardrobe.

“Put some duct tape on your nipples and wear a spiky belt, or you could create a whole outfit out of saran wrap or you could show up wearing nothing at all, or you could just string a chain from your earring to your nose ring to your dick ring to your toe, and that would be your outfit,” says witzel.

“And if you don’t come in an outfit, some bossy person in a fishnet onesie is going to come and be like, ‘take off your pants.’ And then you just have to check your pants, and that’s your night.”

LULU v6 All the Fucks I Never Gave
Friday, June 9, 2017
Buddies in Bad Times Theatre, 12 Alexander St, Toronto
buddiesinbadtimes.com

Courtesy Helen Yung

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